Boston Bans Kids From Attending UFCs on Their Own – How Rich are the Kids in Boston?

Boston Bans Kids From Attending UFCs on Their Own – How Rich are the Kids in Boston?

In a move reminiscent of when they dumped a buttload of tea into their harbor to protest their taxes, the city of Boston has issued a ban on kids 16-years old and younger from attending MMA events unless they’re accompanied by an adult. The reasons cited include the violence of the sport, the fighters joking about rape, blah, blah, blah. What’s really interesting about this ban imposed by the City Council’s Commission is the big question that arises out of the move: How rich are the damn kids in Boston that they can afford to go to an MMA event by themselves? At a minimum, tickets for the worst seats in the house at a crappy UFC – where the main event is something along the lines of Diego Sanchez fighting an empty pinata and the undercard degenerates from there – will set you back at least a hundy, and if you want to be able to see the Octagon without binoculars, you’re shelling out a few hundred more. Can kids in Boston afford this? Seriously? Where do they get their money? Are they all drug dealers?

Here are some things I could afford to buy when I was 16, and keep in mind that I worked part-time washing dishes in a restaurant:

  • Maybe a Commodore 64 that I could plug into my TV (forget getting a monitor).
  • Some fresh Keds.
  • One third of an Adidas tracksuit.
  • The latest Public Enemy cassette tape (“Fear of a Black Planet”), and a large plastic clock to hang around my neck.
  • A baggie of oregano in Washington Square Park, which I was assured was weed, but you know how that goes.

So, Boston kids. They be rich or something.

  • augbesian

    I was at the Boston show, and there were signs right before the last escalators to the ticket takers that said something like ’16 and Under Not Admitted without Parent or Guardian.’ We knew the Boston law hadn’t passed yet, but it couldn’t have mattered much, as any kids were with adults anyway.

    Turns out, there’s already a MA state law about this. Sections 32 to 60something in this chapter are where boxing and mma laws are. https://malegislature.gov/Laws/GeneralLaws/PartI/TitleXX/Chapter147/Section39 “No person under the age of 16 shall be admitted to, or be present at, a professional match or exhibition unless accompanied by an adult. ” So the city council ruling was completely meaningless, other than to say it supports the existing state laws already in place. I guess the original bill was supposed to be 18 and under not admitted, but got very watered down to where this is what ended up passing in the end.

    Fuckin’ politics.

  • andres

    I like you Jim!

  • Doogie Howser, M.D.

    About a million times better than that steaming shit that dreadful Kiki McGraw or Scott Burlesque (or whatever its name was) used to serve up.

    So if Ryan is away sticking his thumb up his ass, this will do. A bit more of it would be nice, though.

  • glassjawsh

    stop being nice to the writers!!!

    “jim genia’s posts are about as appealing as a bowl full of colonic irrigation and aborted fetuses”

    “everything was less terrible before”

    “the site has gone to shit”

    “all the cool people are gone”

    etc, etc, etc et al, ad nauseum

    there…order is restored
    you people are disgraceful

  • agentsmith

    ^ jawsh is correct.

  • Doogie Howser, M.D.

    You should write for the site, Jawsh. You’re just about literate and you’re quite funny. Occasionally. The above made me laugh.

    Come on, man, pick up the slack and be more productive.

  • iamphoenix

    jim genia wrote this with a pen up his ass trying to hit the right letters on the keyboard.

  • CAP

    fuck this

  • Doogie Howser, M.D.

    Phoenix! You’re not dead yet! How are you doing? Still off fighting in Amsterdam?

  • iamphoenix

    i’ve been back since december last year. i need another war…. : (

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