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Condit explains sheet metal snafu

The last we heard from Carlos Condit, he had just been hit by the UFC gypsy curse in the form of a WTF-style sheet metal accident. Finally, someone got in touch with him and asked him exactly what the deal was with that:

“I was kind of moving some stuff around in my garage and I had some old junk. I had a broken dry erase board, like a bulletin board type thing, and I picked it up to kind of toss it over to my trash pile. I kind of Frisbee tossed it, and it had a sharp piece of metal, kind of the surface of the dry erase board, and it sliced me real good,” Condit told in an exclusive interview.

“Initially what happened was I went down to urgent care, got some stitches, and they said that I should be cool in a couple days, so nothing really changed for me.

“I was back to training and everything, but the next day my hand started swelling up and hurting like a son of a bitch and that’s kind of when I decided I wasn’t going to be able to do the fight and then a couple days later I went to see a hand specialist and they admitted me to the hospital right away cause I had a real bad staph infection.”

The staph infection put Condit in the hospital for a six-night stay. When he was released, he was still not able to train full on due to an IV that had to be administered for six weeks for antibiotics to fully flush out the infection.

Goddamn super staph. We’re in a war with bacteria and this one isn’t going well. The more we use antibiotics, the more resistant the new strains become. Since evolution is a lie, the only explanation to this is that God is punishing us, probably because of all that ass sex and other licentious behavior.