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Don’t fuck with the beard

If I hadn’t already seen him sans puffybeard, I’d assume Kimbo was hiding some sort of horrible secret beneath his facial hair. How else can you explain his semi paranoia at the possibility of it getting shaved off in the TUF house?

He loves that beard so much that his management actually tried to get a protection clause put in his Ultimate Fighter 10 contract according to UFC president Dana White:

“His manager kept saying if anybody messes with his beard while he’s sleeping, there’s gonna be some big problems,” White told Mike Chiappetta from Spike TV. “That was like a big deal in the whole contract negotiation.”

White was at a loss for words for Kimbo’s manager Icey Mike (2:10 mark):

“I can’t guarantee nobody’s gonna try to shave his beard off.  How the hell can I guarantee that?”

Magical protective powers aside, I ‘get’ what a key part the beard is to this whole Kimbo Slice persona Kevin Ferguson has created. Kimbo gets paid, son. Kevin Ferguson, not so much. Cutting off his beard would be like cutting off the hands I need to blog on this blog. That is, if my hands could grow back in a few months. Which they could if fucking morons weren’t blocking the development of stem cell technology. WHY AREN’T WE FUNDING THIS???

(picture by AllElbows)