September 17, 2010 at 8:47 pm #17633
Let me know if any of you dysfunctional fucktards (and I say that with the highest of regards) wants me to continue on with “Ask Omomatta”. Not you Jawshy……I already know you need as much help as you can get….and to be honest son, I’m getting tired of hearing about dead hookers in the Midwest. If so, start slinging out the questions. Maybe someday I’ll be able to update the thread and add the old originals.
For those of you who are new….ask me your questions about anything and I will provide you with sage advice and true wisdom. No really…..I’m a fucking mad genius. Of course, I’ve also been known to give horrible advice that could end relationships and maybe even the occasional life…..so….that’s my disclaimer. I will get to the responses as quickly as I can. It’s not like I’m sitting around 24/7 in front of the computer with my raw dick in my hand like the rest of you jackals….I’ve got shit to do. However, I’ve always had quite an interest in philanthropy and will answer everyone’s questions in the order they’ve been asked.
And if you decide to question my advice, I would just like to add in advance, get bent, go fuck yourself, and shut your fucking cock holster.September 17, 2010 at 9:06 pm #314214
I hereby officially retire from soliciting your advice. we had a good run but sometimes two people just grow apart, its not that i don’t love you, im just not IN love with you anymore. and honestly, ive known it was over for a long time now, so ive had a while to prepare for this. it’ll still be hard, things will happen, girls will be impaled or lit on fire or be allowed to put their fingers where fingers shouldn’t go….and ill wonder…what would farva say about this?….but then i’ll remember that i need to be strong and deal with this on my own and i’ll suck it up and move on.
there’s always other fishes (fat bitches) in the sea
you have my blessingSeptember 17, 2010 at 9:21 pm #314217
I’m just going to take that as a “Yes, I’m fucked up and I still need major help.”September 17, 2010 at 9:24 pm #314218
^ That brought a tear to my eye.
Omo, why do I find girls who listen to Rap, R&B, & Hip Hop unattractive? That’s what happened to the groomer chick.September 17, 2010 at 9:39 pm #314219
FiveBolt is full of excuses why he can’t pull the trigger. YOU JUST NEED GENITAL TO GENITAL CONNECTION.September 17, 2010 at 9:55 pm #314221
@FiveBolt….Are you fucking kidding me? Haven’t you ever had a fucking lap dance? Holy fucking shit boy…..chicks that are into R&B and Rap will fucking put it on you. I mean, you seem to be quite an upstanding gentlemen and such, so I can see if she’s straight hood or something. Not every broad is going to be into Mariachi Vargas Extravaganza.
The point is that I’m sure she’s a good girl. So what if she likes to get jiggy wit it or even when she comes around your city bling bling. If she’s a nice girl, you should be able to overlook musical differences. But I have one warning for you….if she asks to perform oral sex on you…..run away….and give her my number.September 17, 2010 at 11:02 pm #314223
Let’s all be honest here – Fivebolt’s thinking hip-hop = dark & spicy Ex-BF meat he can’t compare to. Can his little Mormon ‘ips ‘andle her riddum?
Intimidation is serious, just ask anyone who’s had Wandy’s sloppy seconds – they’re either terrified of him or what he did to her.September 17, 2010 at 11:07 pm #314224
This is why I come here. You guys know how to make me laugh.
And Omo, no, I’ve never had one of those. I’ve never even been to a strip club. I figure, why spend all of that money to get mahogany when you can do it in the privacy of your own home, for free:PSeptember 18, 2010 at 3:35 am #314233
Great and powerful Omo
How can someone as hated as myself not monetize that shitSeptember 18, 2010 at 3:38 am #314234
oh mr. omo how come people actually live in texas?September 18, 2010 at 8:29 pm #314245
@Fivebolt…..lap dances from your Mom don’t count….unless their for me. She can drop it likes it’s hot yo!
@Subo….There’s a fine line between being truly hated and being a gnat on a dogs nut sack. If you’re going to cash in on people despising you….you’re going to have to start digging much deeper. And lets be honest….it bothers you way too fucking much for you to go the whole way with it. I’m just sayin’.
Nuff Said.September 18, 2010 at 9:13 pm #314248
bet she isnt even from texasSeptember 20, 2010 at 7:06 pm #314383
Oh great & powerful Omo–>why did my wife freak out on Saturday when I was walking around the beach in a Speedo? I just finished showering off & was trying to get dry before I put clothes back on…..
Was she ASHAMED or JEALOUS? Or possibly both?September 20, 2010 at 9:37 pm #314403
sad at the size of you pinky weenieSeptember 20, 2010 at 10:16 pm #314407
hahahah Frick is such a Euro homo!!! Frick, were you walking ’round with a pinga colada too?! lol
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