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Ask Omomatta

Home Forums Never-Ending Threads Ask Omomatta

This topic contains 183 replies, has 16 voices, and was last updated by  subo 3 months, 2 weeks ago.

Viewing 15 posts - 106 through 120 (of 184 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • #399576

    Letibleu
    Member

    my very first photoshop!!!

    #399577

    frickshun
    Member

    Haha. G can’t hold down a job. I promise I will make several purchases from your taco truck.

    Agent’s point is probably most valid. Everyone has become spoiled & their expectations of continued growth are unsustainable.

    #399588

    Giallo
    Member

    Is there such a thing as reverse circumcision? cause my head gets cold and I’d like to put on a turtle neck for those cold winter days.

    #399590

    Letibleu
    Member

    just keep your clitoris tucked in your labium and you should stay warm.

    #399591

    Giallo
    Member

    Excellent idea thanks, what about my ovaries for some reason they dropped out into some kind of wrinkly sac thingy.

    #399600

    Omomatta
    Member

    Giallo, you could have a skin graft performed in order to attach a chunk of your ass to your wang, but ask yourself this question…..WHY?

    Everyone knows that if you’re circumcised, by law, you don’t have to wash your dick. Imagine not being able to just wipe your poo sprinkle infested dangler on the sheets after a long night of jackhammering man ass? Do you see where I’m taking this? Less upkeep = Awesomes. It’s man law. Shit, read a fucking book!

    #399601

    Letibleu
    Member

    #399604

    frickshun
    Member

    ^^Why did they smear that baby w/caramel saUUUURAFJSK;ASJDIFJASD. FUUUUUUUUUUU……….ck. Nasty.

    #399605

    Letibleu
    Member

    even though its a picture you can smell it

    #399606

    Giallo
    Member

    lol…fuck you reading’s for intellectual fags

    #399625

    Omomatta
    Member

    “Why did they smear that baby w/caramel?”

    It attracts the dingoes.

    #399635

    Letibleu
    Member

    #399636

    glassjawsh
    Member

    ^ hahahahahahaha

    also frick. you seem like the kind of guy I wouldn’t mind pulling up a stool next to and having a brew with (as long as you paid for it) but your apathy is killing me. the wealth gap is widening and you know it. SOMETHING has to give before we regress back into serfdom

    #399638

    Reverend Clint
    Key Master

    fricks gonna be lower middle management in this new feudal america

    #399652

    iamphoenix
    Member

    frick. you seem like the kind of guy I wouldn’t mind pulling up a stool next to and having a PBR with

Viewing 15 posts - 106 through 120 (of 184 total)

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There are 127 Older Comments about Ask Omomatta

  • glassjawsh says:

    I hereby officially retire from soliciting your advice. we had a good run but sometimes two people just grow apart, its not that i don’t love you, im just not IN love with you anymore. and honestly, ive known it was over for a long time now, so ive had a while to prepare for this. it’ll still be hard, things will happen, girls will be impaled or lit on fire or be allowed to put their fingers where fingers shouldn’t go….and ill wonder…what would farva say about this?….but then i’ll remember that i need to be strong and deal with this on my own and i’ll suck it up and move on.

    there’s always other fishes (fat bitches) in the sea

    you have my blessing

  • Omomatta says:

    I’m just going to take that as a “Yes, I’m fucked up and I still need major help.”

  • FiveBoltMain says:

    ^ That brought a tear to my eye.

    Omo, why do I find girls who listen to Rap, R&B, & Hip Hop unattractive? That’s what happened to the groomer chick.

  • frickshun says:

    FiveBolt is full of excuses why he can’t pull the trigger. YOU JUST NEED GENITAL TO GENITAL CONNECTION.

  • Omomatta says:

    @FiveBolt….Are you fucking kidding me? Haven’t you ever had a fucking lap dance? Holy fucking shit boy…..chicks that are into R&B and Rap will fucking put it on you. I mean, you seem to be quite an upstanding gentlemen and such, so I can see if she’s straight hood or something. Not every broad is going to be into Mariachi Vargas Extravaganza.

    The point is that I’m sure she’s a good girl. So what if she likes to get jiggy wit it or even when she comes around your city bling bling. If she’s a nice girl, you should be able to overlook musical differences. But I have one warning for you….if she asks to perform oral sex on you…..run away….and give her my number.

  • DJ ThunderElbows says:

    Let’s all be honest here – Fivebolt’s thinking hip-hop = dark & spicy Ex-BF meat he can’t compare to. Can his little Mormon ‘ips ‘andle her riddum?

    Intimidation is serious, just ask anyone who’s had Wandy’s sloppy seconds – they’re either terrified of him or what he did to her.

  • FiveBoltMain says:

    This is why I come here. You guys know how to make me laugh.

    And Omo, no, I’ve never had one of those. I’ve never even been to a strip club. I figure, why spend all of that money to get mahogany when you can do it in the privacy of your own home, for free:P

  • subo says:

    Great and powerful Omo

    How can someone as hated as myself not monetize that shit

  • Reverend Clint says:

    oh mr. omo how come people actually live in texas?

  • Omomatta says:

    @Fivebolt…..lap dances from your Mom don’t count….unless their for me. She can drop it likes it’s hot yo!

    @Subo….There’s a fine line between being truly hated and being a gnat on a dogs nut sack. If you’re going to cash in on people despising you….you’re going to have to start digging much deeper. And lets be honest….it bothers you way too fucking much for you to go the whole way with it. I’m just sayin’.

    @Clint…… http://www.wiihotties.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/sexy_cowgirl4.jpg

    Nuff Said.

  • Reverend Clint says:

    bet she isnt even from texas

  • frickshun says:

    Oh great & powerful Omo–>why did my wife freak out on Saturday when I was walking around the beach in a Speedo? I just finished showering off & was trying to get dry before I put clothes back on…..

    Was she ASHAMED or JEALOUS? Or possibly both?

  • Reverend Clint says:

    sad at the size of you pinky weenie

  • G Funk says:

    hahahah Frick is such a Euro homo!!! Frick, were you walking ’round with a pinga colada too?! lol

  • FiveBoltMain says:

    So, when are you moving to San Francisco frick?

  • Omomatta says:

    @ Frickshun….Let’s see here….why did she freak out. Lets list a few “possible” reasons:

    1. She was embarrassed because…well, you were wearing a fucking speedo. Jersey isn’t Australia yo.
    2. She was jealous because, obviously, every woman on the beach was ogling your wedding tackle.
    3. She was so turned on by the vision of your little baby thimble that she drooled all over her shirt.
    4. She was pissed off because you were actually washing the sand off a 6′ Amazon chick with your tongue.

    Clearly she doesn’t want her man running around in his skivies on the beach. Clearly she’s blind, because let’s be honest….nobody else was looking. Well except for that chick over by the bar that puked on her boy’s shoes….don’t act like you didn’t remember.

  • frickshun says:

    G–>I did have a couple of frozen Pina Colada’s w/a dark rum floater (fuckers cost $10 a pop!!). But I chased them w/a bunch of free beerzzzzzzz.

    Omo–>I know you’ve been lonely so I’ll send you some pics!!

  • frickshun says:

    FiveBolt–>I have been to Castro in San Fran. Charming little town of (h)Omo’s.

  • Omomatta says:

    Frick…What a pal. Please tell me there’s fist pumping?……Just whipser it if you’re too embarrassed.

  • frickshun says:

    Told you…..I beat the “Cast of Jerz Shore” in finals!! I’ll send a pic of “JWow” next to me. THAT BITCH WAS HAWT!!

  • glassjawsh says:

    can’t help myself – JWOWw and snooki for that matter are the worst kind of human being and shouldn’t lawfully allowed to be seen in public.

    vapid worthless bitches who have this horribly bloated sense of self worth and undeserved accomplishment because dudes fall all over themselves to give them shit and shower them with praise when really they’ve accomplished nothing at all. it’s like there is this entire caste of talentless, boring, stupid, whore painted bitches out there whose sole purpose is to act like a goddamned moron and piss me off at bars. and then i can’t even say anything to these cunts without their goddamned plucked, tanned and roided guido boyfriends hulking out and trying to stomp on my face.

    honestly id be happier if every one of these asshats were rounded up and shot into the sun

    how can this—> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XNlyKSdbU1E be greeted with anything other than a hearty WTF and a big helping of laughter and ridicule

    RANT!!

    edit: this is not a question

  • frickshun says:

    ^^Wowzers….I don’t watch that show but I see you have strong feelings about it!!

  • DJ ThunderElbows says:

    This is remarkably similar to how these choadstains talk about Jawsh/crackers. Especially the dancing.

  • FiveBoltMain says:

    We’re in the same boat Josh. I can’t stand those chicks. They’re right up there with Paris Hilton and the Kardashians as being talentless fame whores.

  • Omomatta says:

    Okay, stop gaying up the self help thread and stop acting like a bunch of wheezing sloppy cunts. “Pretty girls….I hate ‘em…wah wah wah wah wah.”

    Or maybe even ask “why am I such a sopping cunt rag?” that could work…

  • G Funk says:

    Oh almighty and wise Great Omomatta, I humbley ask of your greatness to bestow your knowledge and acumen upon me! I like many others have aspirations and goals that I’m currently working very hard at in life. More specifically a career and geographical move. Yes, working in the insurance field pays the bills and gives my family and I a life of which I cannot complain, however I feel that there is something to which I would enjoy and strive to do better and at the same time provide an even better life.

    This goal that I have been researching, planning and saving for over a year now is closer to becoming a reality, however there lies much more work and preperations ahead in order to achieve this dream. It will not be an easy one as it would relocate my family and I to the other side of the country in a land of which I know nothing about, nor do I know any of it’s inhabitants. This of coarse will seperate my better half and I from our families of which we are very close to and the South Florida life that we love.

    No this is and will not be an undemanding endeavor, but it is something that is of a “primal calling” if you will. Oh great one we ask of your knowledge and direction, and if comes forth naturally, your blessing…

  • frickshun says:

    ^^Start by spelling “preparations” properly.

  • Omomatta says:

    @G Funk…..I say throw caution to the wind and fly. It’s only once in a lifetime that you get an opportunity to be a porn star. All of those years of nailing Cuban chicks is finally paying off. Your wife is such a supportive individual and it’s so amazing that she understands that it’s just “work”, a dream, and that it’s not like you’re really enjoying yourself or anything.

    Some people may not agree, including your family, but you have to follow your heart. If they love you they’ll be supportive….shit, they may even purchase your movies to show friends. And listen, I understand that they don’t see the value of the midget amputee fetish films that you’ll be working on, but it’s not about understanding…..it’s about trusting and loving. Be sure to tell them how important it is, and that from time to time you get to bring your work home with you and that your wife will get to share your little gimpy nuggets of joy.

    G, it’s a win win if you ask me brother. Get all Danny LaRusso on that ass, jump in the grocery getter, and hoof it to the Left Coast. Be sure to send me a post card……and a link. Tell the wifey I said hey and good luck.

  • G Funk says:

    The almighty has spoken!

    Frick, Frick you joysee douche!

  • Omomatta says:

    ^^Grammatically anal…..joysee douchenozzle. Emphasis on anal.

  • G Funk says:

    Oh great Omomatta, aka. Omo, aka Homomatta, aka Fernando, how do you forsee the intensity of the pain in your ass after watching the MIAMI Dolphins wipe the grass turf with your beloved Pitt Steelers?

  • Omomatta says:

    @ G Funk……..please send me some of the rocks that you’re smoking. Do you remember that 41-14 loss to that Patsies? Yes? Okay, I was just curious. Actually, I didn’t even know Miami was in the AFC……

    As for the pain in my ass….I’d say it will be along the lines of double soft Charmin.

    Kudos for being a die hard fan. I applaud you.

  • G Funk says:

    That shitty Pats game was completly due to a special teams melt-down. I’m expecting a good game, but Wake and the fish D will squish Worthlessburger!

  • Omomatta says:

    Okay, here’s the bet…..If Pittsburgh wins, I’ll stop diddling your wife….If Miami wins I’ll tell my kids who their real Daddy is. Deal?

  • subo says:

    Omo: How can people even debate Orton v Cutler now? Hasn’t that question already been answered definitively in Orton’s favor?

  • Omomatta says:
  • G Funk says:

    That bet sucks! You stay paying support for my spawn. I’ll stop forwarding provocative photos of your “ex” and I, deal?

  • glassjawsh says:

    i used to be in a regular hold em game with orton and his girlfriend (who he later knocked up and subsequently left when he got drafted) dude sucks at cards

  • Omomatta says:

    Then what the fucks going to entertain me G?

    I don’t think we’ll be able to come to terms. Oh well. We can both at least agree that Miami’s uniforms look queer as a three dollar bill.

  • Millertime says:

    Omo- Shave clean, airstrip, or let it grow wild?

    Why does Jawsh hate the world more than an Emo cutter?

  • glassjawsh says:

    ^ (insert witty syphilis joke from omo)

    i don’t hate the world, I just find it comical that you are using the very tactics that you accuse subo of using (uninformed, unfunny, illiterate, attention whoring drivel) and claim to be the reasons for hating him, all while trying to replace (rape?) him.

    now if you’ll excuse me i have to go masturbate with razorblades

  • Omomatta says:

    @Millertime…..Great question son. I can only speak from personal preference…..Fiveboltmain…start taking notes…….now:

    Full bore kakooya…….I wouldn’t kick it out of bed for eating potato chips. It’s a delicate creature and in some cases can scare the daylights out of you. Drunken, overly intoxicated kakooya’s may come with all kinds of surprises that leave you spitting little white balls out of your mouth.. So, beware.

    Air strip…..caution..may cause chaffing on the old schnozola. Speaking from experience it is known to happen.

    Completely shorn….What a magnificent masterpiece. Smooth as the day is long, slick, squishy…..that’s my shit dog.

    Now, if you’re a pussy, borderline homo who doesn’t like going down town….it doesn’t fucking matter. Don’t be fucking picky, you’re just lucky to be there.

    @Millertime…..I don’t think Jawshy hates the world, I just think he likes damaged women way too much……..and it’s getting to him.

  • subo says:

    ^ Truer words, man. If you’re too good for hair pie you’re too good for me.

    I actually appreciate the landing strip under the nose – gives it a place to rest.

  • frickshun says:

    Can someone clarify why you’re talking about eating pussy? I enjoy the hell out of it (almost as much as the chick) but I didn’t think it was worth discussing…..

  • Omomatta says:

    @Frickshun…….To answer your question, No.

  • Reverend Clint says:

    oh great omo if you were to find yourself in a zombie apocalypse how would you survive?

  • Letibleu says:

    A guy who can perform oral wonders on a female is 75% more likely to be invited into a threesome with 2 chicks.

    On a non related note, 82.6% of statistics are made up on the spot.

  • Reverend Clint says:

    1 of 3 South African men have raped a woman

  • iamphoenix says:

    90% of jackals don’t know what a jackal is.

  • Letibleu says:

    A true Jackal bought the T-Shirt to prove it and doesn’t hide it in the closet or drawer.

  • Omomatta says:

    @ Clint…..It is very simple. I would turn myself over to the dark side. Let’s face it….the world would fucking suck after a zombie apocalypse. I would much rather focus on fucking up the remainder of the living breathing human population.

    97% of Jackals didn’t buy a T-Shirt because Jackals don’t support causes.

  • frickshun says:

    I support theft & piracy.

  • Omomatta says:

    Okay, so you support broke ass bitches? Theft and piracy aren’t really a cause.

  • subo says:

    Yeah, frick – call it ‘digital freedom’, it sounds better

  • frickshun says:

    ^^I dig it.

  • frickshun says:

    PS: I spent 4 hrs last night loading up a friend’s Kindle w/ 700 “liberated” books. Stupid mobi format takes forever to convert!!

  • Omomatta says:

    Yeah….you are kind of a fancy pants, aren’t you…

  • DJ ThunderElbows says:

    I like that he admits to having friends who couldn’t do it themselves.

  • Omomatta says:

    Let’s be honest. If his “friend” can’t load books by him/herself….they’re probably going to have an extremely difficult time reading one book….not to mention 700.

  • G Funk says:

    Uh, I think you guys missed the ‘key’ words of ‘liberated’ books, and ‘convert’ in his post. Not evryone knows how to hack chit.

  • frickshun says:

    Not that it’s worth explaining……but it’s my wife’s friend who is giving it to her father. Clearly, a 65-70 yr old guy won’t be stealing & converting books from da net!! And NO WOMAN knows how to work anything mechanical or electronic.

    Ask my wife how to put games on my kids’ DS. Or how to take pics from the camera & put on the laptop. I’ll wait…..

  • glassjawsh says:

    ^ and then they get shitty with you because you’d rather take 3 minutes to do it yourself instead of wasting an hour trying to show them how to do it. and even if you do go through with it and show them they STILL ask you to do it for them later!

    wait, are we talking about electronics or about sex?

  • CAP says:

    ^Every time I have to watch my wife work on a computer it’s so painful I have to leave the room. It will completely ruin her day too if she gets all worked up, in turn ruining mine. I have come close to a few backhands before but I composed myself. “Desktop? what do you mean?”

    MOOOOOVE.

  • DJ ThunderElbows says:

    I think I better understand the level of intelligence required to marry you imbeciles.

  • frickshun says:

    DJ–>are you addressing us or women in general?

    Last night I watched my wife create some dumb elf dancing vid where you paste your family’s faces onto their bodies. The end result was surprisingly funny (watching my daughters & my dog dance). But waiting for my wife to properly size/rotate/crop the faces to fit the bodies was EXCRUTIATING.

    The worst part about computer shit is that my wife thinks I WANT to be sitting there for hours troubleshooting why fucking Moonshell won’t play stolen movies on the DS. OR when I spend a couple of hours updating our music collection & harvesting album covers so Coverflow can be used!! Maybe I just need to buy a $3k computer so the shit doesn’t take so damn long….

  • frickshun says:

    PS: Why, Omo? Why?!

  • Reverend Clint says:

    my gf finally knows how to cut and paste

  • G Funk says:

    My wife is decently computer savy. She should, all she does is Televisiphonernet ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

  • frickshun says:

    G–>ditto. Yet, she’s pretty retarded outside of planting crops in Farmville, tagging pics on Facebook or DVRing her girl shows. Except the dumbass still records the SD channel or…….THE SD CHANNEL & THE HD CHANNEL @ THE SAME TIME.

    Thank fucking gawd she cooks & does laundry!!

  • Omomatta says:

    @Frick….because you’re Jewish and you’re too fucking cheap to drop 3 G’s on a computer.

    …that was the part you wanted answered right?

  • frickshun says:

    Thanks…..I keep forgetting!! (til I get out of the shower & stand in front of a mirror)

  • G Funk says:

    HAHAHA

  • Omomatta says:

    Yeah….then you realize you’re Korean from the waste down.

  • frickshun says:

    “waist”

    Actually, from BELOW my dick down, I’m black. Why couldn’t it start @ my crotch????

  • GoldenArms says:

    frickshun is gay

  • Omomatta says:

    Thank you for correcting my grammar. I agree with GoldenArms.

  • Reverend Clint says:

    if you are korean from the waist down it is a waste… of space

  • G Funk says:

    Nice, almost Cliche.

  • frickshun says:

    Omo–>I corrected spelling, not grammar.

    GoldenArms is all over me……at least buy me a drink 1st, big boy!!

  • Omomatta says:

    Frick…..you’re the straightest gay man I’ve ever known.

  • G Funk says:

    Ima dust this bottle off and ask some questions in the ‘ask thread’ of a true wise-man.

    ilovepenis has lost some spunk, will he ever regain? Was he a fad? Or has the north koreans released some sort of unknown sub-conscious weapon that kills the pizazz of American soldiers?

    Now that Frick’s wife has accepted my invitation to strip weeknights at the joysee tiity-bar for douches will Frick be able to with-stand the tax onslaught that uncle Sam will unleash upon him?

    Will Glassdick ever be able to escape the bumbkin-clad river of deliverance that has locked him down?

    Is Butters “special”?

  • Omomatta says:

    Many good questions G….where should I start?

    phoenix has shot his proverbial hilarity wad. It seems to me that due to his time in the military his brain cells may actually be regenerating. I propose that he takes a sabbatical from trying to be funny until A) He retires from the service and starts touring with Phish again or B) He stops swallowing Frick’s semen….because let’s face it….I think his lack of comedic skills are being transferred from his seed and being deposited directly into phoenix’s funny bone.

    Are you kidding…..Frick’s a Jew, not a Republican. The guy’s already scheduled his 2011 vacation so he can go in for his calf implant surgery this April. (bad month by the way…the temperature swings will wreak havoc on the implants settling properly between the skin and muscle) And for fucksake, he’s been FLIMing me for 3 weeks already offering me 13% off lap dances and Senior Citizen’s rate for private showers.

    My prediction is that Jawsh is going to end up settling down with one of the nice girls he’s been courting over the last few months. He’s gonna need that Master’s Degree for sure because trust me, babies don’t pay for themselves…..neither do weddings.

    By “Butters”, I’m gathering that you are referring to xxFiveboltMainxxyz. I have another name that I’m going to have to be getting used to calling him…..Son. It really doesn’t roll off the tongue as well as Mamacita’s whisker drippings, but I think it will mean quite a bit to him. There’s nothing better than hanging in the back yard, pushing him on the swings, playing catch, watching cartoons. In my opinion he’s just been sheltered. I’ve already threatened him that if he doesn’t stop down at the groomer’s and invite that little piece of ass up for a three way with the old lady and I, I’m going to rat on him and the fact that he’s been viewing this website. His ass will get lit up like a Christmas tree for sure. And by all means…..yes, he is very special.

  • subo says:

    Eric Cantor is a Jew and a Republican.

  • Reverend Clint says:

    apparently so was jesus

  • Omomatta says:

    Wow! Clint I actually laughed out loud from that one.

  • iamphoenix says:

    “ilovepenis has lost some spunk, will he ever regain? Was he a fad? Or has the north koreans released some sort of unknown sub-conscious weapon that kills the pizazz of American soldiers?”

    to be honest, (for once) shits been stupid and i feel that i should answer your question with another question.

  • glassjawsh says:

    this thread was awesome. i miss humor and how stupid frick’s wife is….

  • G Funk says:

    Nice dusting Jawshy. Twas nice. Sucks that the chit from FL1.0-2.2 is lost forevs :-(

  • Omomatta says:

    I was thinking about this thread just the other day. My wealth of knowlege has been sitting idly by, but I surely cannot bump my own advice thread. The Jackals must come forth with questions….and I shall respond with my infinite wisdom, or some shit.

  • frickshun says:

    Jawsh–>it’s not that she’s stupid. It’s that you’re super smart. You’re so smart that you’re whining to Facebook about the distribution of wealth in this country. THAT’LL SHOW ‘EM!! All the Richie Rich rich folk base their business decisions on Facebook rants by poor male librarians. Yes, we should pay the non-conforming idealist for these great fucking ideas.

    ‘scuse me while I sit over here thinking about what I should pack for my vacation next weekend.

    Oh great & wise Omo, why is it that raw foods are so good for us but they make my stomach ache & the air around my anus putrid?

  • Omomatta says:

    Frick, most digestion occurs within the small intestine, where enzymes and bile break down food. These enzymes, however, are unable to break down some elements, such as specific sugars in beans and other plants. Thus, undigested matter passes into the large intestine, where bacteria ferments it. This leads to the production of “flatus” (gas), composed primarily of carbon dioxide, methane and hydrogen. Ironically, the more healthful and fiber-rich your diet, the more likely you are to experience flatulence. Other factors include how much air you swallow, the amount of bacteria residing in the intestine and the time it takes for food to pass through the colon. It’s not the foods themselves, but the body’s reaction to them that causes the problem.

    Typically, the odor is somewhat offensive, but able to be easily managed/masked by a method known as the “walking farts”, where the flatulator strolls through the office allowing small amounts of the noxious fumes to leave the anus in small doses as to diffuse the odor. Now, in your case, when you take the natural odors of organic food decompostion and introduce quantities of day old semen……the odor is so overwhelming that you have no choice but to grin and bear it.

  • Letibleu says:

    they made a vsauce for this

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zt9rvaijpPY

  • iamphoenix says:

    i had a cup of noodles the other night. i farted a lot. then a rice crispy treat. still the farts.

    my favorite line-

    where the flatulator strolls through the office allowing small amounts of the noxious fumes to leave the anus in small doses as to diffuse the odor.

  • G Funk says:

    That made me lol too! HomoFernando is back!

  • agentsmith says:
  • frickshun says:

    Thanks for making me lawl right after I told my entire dept to shut the fuck up & stop chit chatting for the rest of the day!! FUCKING OMO & PHOENINJER.

  • glassjawsh says:

    gotta educate people so once their in a position to make a difference their not jaded and apathetic (read: frick)

    sowing the seeds of change no matter how small the plot.

    at least you make me laugh on teh netz

  • glassjawsh says:

    I know I’m banned from asking questions but this ones not about my fucked up sex life and I’d actually like to know omo’s opinion. what are your thoughts on all the sabre rattling and gnashing of teeth going on in this country? a class system revolution or just another footnote in a long history of oppression?

  • agentsmith says:

    what are your thoughts on all the sabre rattling and gnashing of teeth going on in this country? a class system revolution or just another footnote in a long history of oppression?

    There’s been a historical pattern going for a long time now where each generation has had significantly greater wealth and status of living than the one before it.  Ask your grandparents what shit was like even before the Depression and you’ll realize how poor the average person used to be relative to now.  My father-in-law grew up in Switzerland right after WW2, and he remembers scavenging for coal by the railroad tracks with his father.  That’s probably an extreme story, and Europe had it rougher than us, but even here people simply didn’t have “disposable income” like so many of us do now.  Go back to the 1800′s and shit was even worse.  That kind of poverty just doesn’t exist in the West anymore… but it might again in the future.  The US government is basically bankrupt, and there’s a bunch of reasons why the US dollar could collapse like the house of cards that it is.  Like if the rest of the world simply stops using dollars to buy oil, which some countries are already starting to do.  That was a major reason for the Iraq war, by the way.

    Anyway, there’s a shitload of Chicken Littles out there who think a “Greater Depression” is coming.  I dunno if it’ll be that bad, but I think people should definitely expect that our generation is the last of the cycle… our children will be lucky to just hold steady at the level of wealth that we have now, and there’s a good chance it’ll drop at least slightly.  And when it does, you can naturally expect widespread protests and even civil unrest, particularly from all the entitled kids who thought they’d be millionaires by the time they turned 30 or something.  I think that’s a big part of the Occupy movement… young people are realizing that the promise of a even brighter future probably isn’t going to come true, especially when they’re too entitled to actually work for it.  Folks have gotten fucking spoiled, so they’re gonna be pissed when their toys get taken away.

    Which is the real reason behind shit like the “National Defense Resources Preparedness” order and the NDAA… it’s not about domestic terrorism, it’s about civil unrest.  The government is basically preparing to defend itself against its own citizens, because it knows that economic upheaval is coming.  And of course no one is gonna call out Obama on that shit, because they’re all players in the same game… they don’t wanna change the rules, they just wanna be the ones in control.

    I know that sounds kinda Alex Jones-ish, but it’s not at all far-fetched.  One way or another, shit’s probably gonna get real in the next few years.

  • iamphoenix says:

    just don’t take my interwebs.

  • iamphoenix says:

    that link asian smif makes more since than people just saying no blood for oil. they should have been saying, no blood to keep countries from switching to different currencies to buy and sell oil

  • Omomatta says:

    See Jawshy, this is more of a help related forum, not a “What would you do” environment. Honestly, I’m not politically driven, I don’t watch the news and I rarely read periodicals. All I can say is that I hope you aren’t out there with your hand out expecting something. In life I’ve been taught that hard work pays off and clearly I’m a product of that. Seriously, look at me, I’m fucking awesome.

    …..and who banned you from asking questions about your disturbed sexual life? Was it me? If it was, sorry, ask away!

  • G Funk says:

    What da fuck nigga? Lay you pimp hand scrong. WTF can’t you see that the title says, “Askk HomoFernando”?

    Frick I hope “you’re” putting that money to good use and preparing for a shitty day. If your employment longevity has any faults, it’s the lack of job security awareness and the tribulations that unfold. I too started working for a good company young and began making six figures soon thereafter. Business was always plentiful for the eight years I worked there. Ballin. Until the owner lost his nuts to the Real-estate and Stock Markets along with a couple of bad non-related business flops… Oh Fuck. Where did the FUCKING money go? So was the greatest question in the world. I mean I saved some, but I promptly realized it wasn’t enough. No where near enough.

    Now obviously since my field of expertise was so valuable for so long and I have a great resume with my former employer to back me up to the fullest, I would surely come across an equal endeavor fairly swift no? HA! Within 6 months we were chewing on cables.

    Now I bounced back. It took just over a year. Through that time it was almost an employment re-birth starting odd-jobs here and there taking anything that came until positions opened up with some network relationships I previously made. However, I feel it was a good thing to experience as it completely changed the way we view and manage our money.

    I’m in the market for a 10 acre chunk with a house fairly close to the city and invest in as much self-sustainability as possible. Wind turbines are alot cheaper than I thought, wells are already drilled out there and the land ready to infuse. If I invest in that now, a rainy day or collapse of the dollar wont hurt quite as much.

    Though now I remembered “you’re” a Jew and therefore have lots of jewgold burrowed away in a closeable jew-egg. Jew. Stoned open rant. mybad

  • Letibleu says:

    my very first photoshop!!!

  • frickshun says:

    Haha. G can’t hold down a job. I promise I will make several purchases from your taco truck.

    Agent’s point is probably most valid. Everyone has become spoiled & their expectations of continued growth are unsustainable.

  • Giallo says:

    Is there such a thing as reverse circumcision? cause my head gets cold and I’d like to put on a turtle neck for those cold winter days.

  • Letibleu says:

    just keep your clitoris tucked in your labium and you should stay warm.

  • Giallo says:

    Excellent idea thanks, what about my ovaries for some reason they dropped out into some kind of wrinkly sac thingy.

  • Omomatta says:

    Giallo, you could have a skin graft performed in order to attach a chunk of your ass to your wang, but ask yourself this question…..WHY?

    Everyone knows that if you’re circumcised, by law, you don’t have to wash your dick. Imagine not being able to just wipe your poo sprinkle infested dangler on the sheets after a long night of jackhammering man ass? Do you see where I’m taking this? Less upkeep = Awesomes. It’s man law. Shit, read a fucking book!

  • Letibleu says:

  • frickshun says:

    ^^Why did they smear that baby w/caramel saUUUURAFJSK;ASJDIFJASD. FUUUUUUUUUUU……….ck. Nasty.

  • Letibleu says:

    even though its a picture you can smell it

  • Giallo says:

    lol…fuck you reading’s for intellectual fags

  • Omomatta says:

    “Why did they smear that baby w/caramel?”

    It attracts the dingoes.

  • Letibleu says:

  • glassjawsh says:

    ^ hahahahahahaha

    also frick. you seem like the kind of guy I wouldn’t mind pulling up a stool next to and having a brew with (as long as you paid for it) but your apathy is killing me. the wealth gap is widening and you know it. SOMETHING has to give before we regress back into serfdom

  • Reverend Clint says:

    fricks gonna be lower middle management in this new feudal america

  • iamphoenix says:

    frick. you seem like the kind of guy I wouldn’t mind pulling up a stool next to and having a PBR with

  • Reverend Clint says:

    and then drunk buttfucking in the alley behind the bar

  • Omomatta says:

    Frick drinks Appletinis fucktards. And he doesn’t pull up stools, he pushes stool.

  • Letibleu says:

    ^^ had a mouthful of lemonade that the above comment made me spray all over my screen. I just realized how much i missed this thread.

  • frickshun says:

    Omo–>you’re fucking NAStradamus b/c when I lived a few minutes closer to work, I used to come home for lunch, slam a gigantic Appletini w/my lunch & drive my buzzed ass back to work. What can I say? I have a sugar addiction.

    Unlike you macho macho men, I drink beer, wine, fruity mixed drinks, Port, hard liquor…..pretty much whatever gets me buzzed. Here’s something I learned from experience: unless you let it ferment 1st, semen will NOT get you drunk.

  • Letibleu says:

    and i quote the above

    I learned from experience

  • frickshun says:

    and i quote the above

    and i quote the above

  • iamphoenix says:

    and i quote the above

    and i quote the above

     

    and i quote the above

  • Omomatta says:

    “slam a gigantic Appletini w/my lunch & drive my buzzed ass back to work. What can I say?”

    Wow Toucan Sam, you’re a cheap date…..which matches the rest of you.

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