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I Banish Thee

(Matthew Polly, our resident scribe of non-ill repute, jumps into the dark dangerous realms of gender issues and forbidden words. His upcoming book, Tapped Out, will be out two days before GSP and Nick Diaz fight!)

Ryan has already written at length about Motorboat Gate II. But like most reporters, media car crashes are my crack cocaine. So this smash-up has me on my knees sucking cock for rock. Let me start with Ryan, so he’ll let me post my two cents.

Ryan, you are completely right. [Sound of slurping.] No one should be shocked, shocked that a shock comic like Rogan called a female reporter cunty. I was shocked that he was careful enough to add the “y.” That’s Rogan being polite.

In an act of masochism, I read the entire UG thread until my eyes started bleeding. First, cunty was one of the nicer things written about Maggie Hendricks and her post. Lord, I thought I played rough. Second, Rogan’s got a point.

Maggie Hendricks didn’t argue that Rampage should apologize for his behavior. She didn’t argue that the UFC should yank his chain and fine him. Both of those would have been expected, mainstream responses. Instead, she argued his past behavior towards both male and female reporters was so beyond the pale that the entire MMA press corp should SHUN him. And the specific reason we should do this is to damage and/or end his MMA and movie career.

We continue to interview the man and give him the publicity he needs to further his career…Let’s stop doing that.

Obviously, this will never happen in the MMA niche (and Maggie knows it) until Rampage’s fighting career is as dead as Tank Abbott’s. But the movie business is a different beast. If Fox wants to recast Jackson in The A-Team II, they have to buy insurance for him. And the amount depends on the risk that he will go on a 3-day energy drink bender, assault a reporter (or a pregnant woman), get arrested, and thus shut down production. They also have to assess the value of an actor they can’t send out to sell the movie, because they are terrified he’ll dry hump ET’s Nancy O’Dell.

In other words, Rampage’s future income depends on his reputation, which is shaped by the press, for stability and reliability. Hendrick’s post was a conscious effort to damage both. Or as my dad would say, she wants to take money out of his pocket and food off his children’s plates.

It is a clever strategy and perhaps even a justified one. But it is also pretty cunty. Then again I spent last night re-watching Trainspotting, so I may be desensitized to the word.

  • Reverend Clint

    Rampage desnt have to worry about the A-Team 2… its not going to happen since it failed to make enough money.

    And she is cunty… She shall for ever be known as Sandy Cunty

  • iamphoenix

    anybody else think maggie gylennhal was a bad choice to be in the dark knight? she looks like a wrinkled baby.

  • Reverend Clint

    ^yeah she is so damn ugly

  • DJ ThunderElbows

    I think she was justified in voicing her social engineering plan.  Say he’s a schmuck, say he shouldn’t do it, stop supporting the companies who pay him to rep them while acting like that and say why you’ve done it.  Done.

    I don’t have a big deal with her expressing the same thing people who don’t want to support her express.  I also don’t care if a comedian got on a forum and complained.

    I think what Tantrum did would be fine in a group of friends clowning around, but not where someone else has to earn a living putting up with your shit.  He has stated that his parents don’t even like him and I’m pretty sure we’re just seeing the tip of why.

    That said, I think this gate-shitstorm is completely unfocused, unproductive and annoying.

    In conclusion, I’m surprised Rogan didn’t call her “Faggy Cuntricks.”

  • Goodfella

    DJ fuckface stfu.
    MMA fans need to stop clicking on anything related to this supid cunt and her crying. bitch just wants attention.

  • iamphoenix

    “MMA fans need to stop clicking on anything related to this supid cunt”

    like you just did? haha tool.

  • glassjawsh

    im already bored of this story

  • Reverend Clint

    im bored of your mom

  • iamphoenix

    fuck your moder your sister your grandmoder. i already fucked dim you sode umm bich

  • knopfauge

    Extreme Stick Fighting!!!

  • glassjawsh

    to be fair. my mom is boring

  • matthewpolly

    She has her moments.

  • agentsmith

    I think it’s important to put this whole Rampage/Rogan thing in context… and by that I mean remember that the guy who runs the #1 league in the sport (and indirectly the #2 as well) drops F-bombs like a drunk sailor, called another female reporter a “stupid bitch”, and told a fighter’s girlfriend to “shut the fuck up” on Twitter, among other things.  I’d bet good money that Dana’s reaction to all this was to just laugh and laugh.

    As far as Hendricks saying reporters should boycott Rampage, I think she’s got the cart before the horse… reporters don’t interview Rampage because Rampage or Dana wants them to, they do it because it’s their fucking JOB.  Good luck telling your boss about how you refuse to cover one of the top athletes in the sport, Mags.

  • Reverend Clint

    I hope this doesnt ruin Matts chances of selling books to cunts around the world

  • Omomatta

    Like people ACTUALLY visit this site Clint. HA! You’re funny!

  • matthewpolly

    I’m huge with the cunts.

  • Reverend Clint

    no your with the huge cunts… get it right

  • Letibleu

    At the end of the day, what matters is you will never see a female fighter flagpole a male reporter. Cyborg doesnt count.

  • matthewpolly

    Does Carano sticking out her tongue count as sexual harassment?

  • frickshun

    ^^When she sticks out her tongue, all I see is this…..

  • kvelertak

    I got banned from bloody elbow for asking:

    “Are you guys a chick blog now?”

  • matthewpolly

    That’s fucking funny. They must be, if their pussies are so sensitive.

  • Reverend Clint

    bloodyanus sucks

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