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Jeff Monson Gets Screwed By ESPN

Between cage fighting and public anarchy, Jeff Monson has had little time for his true love: ballroom dancing.

The Olympian is reporting that ‘The Snowman’ is wanted for first-degree malicious mischief by Washington state authorities. The felony charges carries a maximum penalty of 10 years in prison and a $20,000 fine. Monson and others spray-painted columns of the capitol building in protest of economic inequality at home and abroad and the war in Iraq. Everybody knows that the best way to bring about equality in society is to draw pictures on buildings.

Those detectives working in Washington must be pretty smart. I would guess that they brought their best forensic scientists down to the capitol building and found a strand of hair that fell from Monson’s flowing locks, thus linking him to the graffiti. I would be wrong. ESPN The Magazine ‘goofed’ and printed pictures of ‘The Snowman’ in their December issue redecorating the building. The caption above the photo actually read “On a recent night in Olympia, Monson suddenly pulled out a spray can and tagged the state capitol.” No one working at that magazine thought that printing such photographs might not work out too well for Monson. I would bet that the self-proclaimed ‘anarchist’ is going to be none too happy with the folks at ESPN. I bet he might even spray silly symbols on their building, too.

The graffiti cost over $19,000 to repair, according to state officials. That sounds like a lot of money just to get rid of some paint. I would say painting over the graffiti would do the trick or maybe using some graffiti remover. But hey, I’m sure $19,000 is an accurate assessment. It’s not like government officials ever lie about stuff.

Luckily for Monson, he’s out of state right now, meaning he has yet to be arrested. Based on his comments, the former UFC title challenger is confused between civil disobedience and destroying public property. When contacted by The Olympian, he had this to say:

Every great movement in the United States, from civil rights, women’s rights, the labor movement, has been the result of people standing up and breaking the law, refusing to stand at the back of the bus, refusing to stand aside when the government asks you to get off their property. And now, these people are seen as pioneers.

To sum it all up, someone at ESPN The Magazine is a fucking idiot lacking common sense, someone working as a government official for Washington state is lying out their teeth exaggerating, and Jeff Monson is batshit crazy a little off in the head.