twitter google

Jon Jones had an eventful weekend

Dana White says he wakes up every day wondering what’s going to go wrong, but I bet he didn’t expect to get a call on Saturday informing him that his light heavyweight champ and squeaky clean posterboy was booked for DUI. Jon Jones crashed his vehicle into a pole at 5am in the morning this weekend and was bailed out by his mom a few hours later.

Jones walked (or at least staggered) away without injury. Not so lucky was his 2012 Bentley Continental GT – a car that costs a quarter of a million dollars. I guess when you’ve got a high performance piece of equipment like that, slamming the engine into a pole basically FUBARs the whole thing because it’s apparently a write off.

All this is extra surprising since up until now it was generally believed that Jones – like his best bud Jesus – was incapable of erring or making mistakes. Afterwards, many fans flocked to the internet to celebrate his outing as the two-faced fake they always suspected him to be. The richest / most ironic Jon Jones quote being thrown around: “I think they trust that I will never make them look bad. You never have to worry about me getting a DWI or doing something crazy. I think I’m a good company guy.”

When reached for comment, Rashad Evans said ‘I’m praying for him.’ Ha! Not really. But see how dickish that sounds when you turn it around? It’s holier than thou crap like that which has everyone so thoroughly amused by this whole situation. This is a guy who once distanced himself from Muhammad Ali comparisons because Ali was a ‘flawed’ person. Insert something here about motes, eyes, logs, yada yada yada.

After the jump, more media from the crash.

Years from now people will make pilgrimages to Upstate New York to visit the pole Saint Bones martyred his Bentley upon.

Gordo, j’taime.

  • Ron Jeremy
  • Ron Jeremy

    G.O.A.T.
    http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd462/Letibleu/jonjonesmugshot.png

  • iamphoenix

    i r sad. i need interwebs on mah own computar for to photer chop things.
    this is too great

  • drunkenjunk

    i’d like to thank my lord and savior jesus christ, without him none of this is possible.

  • Mike Winklejohnson

    Him and A Silva are just super fake. If Jones has to say that he ‘tries to be a good person’ in every fucking interview then it may be because he’s NOT. What it really means is ‘I’ll put on a typical good guy front’ whenever I can.
    Good thing people are wising to that now. Although the die hard fans will never open their eyes and see the truth.

  • Voice of Reason

    inb4 ‘U just haterzzzz cus he super good dog’

  • TheRimReaper

    I definitely do not approve of drinking and driving.

    …under 45 miles and hour.
    But around 60-65 fucking rules!

    You know those lines that tell you what lane your in?

    There’s like 5-6 times as many.
    You can just pick you favorite one.

    And you have to stick your whole head out of the window and really get that wind blowing in your face!
    You feel just like superman!

    I almost feel sorry for the people who have never put forth the effort to truly taste the nectar of life.

    But the lord rewards those who take the initiative.

  • theinsaneoneJustinMcCully

    It’s too good to be true.  It’s fake.  Karma doesn’t work like that.

  • TheRimReaper

    Eh, not really all that unexpected from a 24 year old.
    You didn’t really believe that he was perfect did you?

    Although I dont see how it should be a shame to try to be the best that you can.

    Guess what, he’ll be buying another Bentley, and some people will still be driving an ’88 toyota for the rest of their lives.

  • SHORT_BUS

    Sure is a lot of fake outrage over this little clusterfuck. Who gives a shit. All the complaints that he’s “fake” or cocky crack me up. That’s the kind of nonsense high school girls get wrapped around
    the axle about.

  • Voice of Reason

    ^ Yeah…..High school girls like Rashad Evans and Chael Sonnen and Dan Henderson…

  • Ron Jeremy

    MMA outside of the cage is like watching a soap opera. Without the incest. Well, maybe a little (looking at you paul harris)

  • Blackula Jonez

    Poor Rashad, even after the fight he is still ostensibly attached to Bones. How peculiar is it that since most people don’t know any other notable fighter figures who are JBJ’s buddy they have to go to the guy who built his last fight off of how they USED TO BE friends.
    Anywho, people who buy into professional athletes as role modes/perfect human beings are on the same level as those who think pro wrestling is real.

    I am indifferent to the out of cage antics of JBJ, this incident changes nothing and reinforces my stance on the issue.

  • frickshun

    Black’s stance has been reinforced. LOOK OUT WORLD!!

    I agree though about the nonsensical fake outrage. I assume all of us know someone that has driven drunk or gotten a DUI. Hell, I’ve been behind the wheel buzzed. It’s stupid but not like he got caught doing crack while being the mayor of DC.

  • theinsaneoneJustinMcCully

    Only beauty parlor bitches visit forums.  Blackula’s argument is invalid.

  • Voice of Reason

    Don’t you fucking get it? The outrage is not that he did a DUI, it’s that he pretends he’s not that kind of person. For fuck’s sake, he even said it in his ‘company man role model’ speech. And if they wanna be a role model then they gotta expect hate when they do stupid shit like that.No one would care if Leben gets a DUI, cos he doesn’t PRETEND to be a role model.

  • http://www.mattpolly.com matthewpolly

    In English class they taught us that there are only 3 forms of drama: man vs man, man vs nature, and man vs himself. Since no one seems to be able to challenge Jones in the ring, the only drama he can provide is against himself and nature (that tree). Kudos to Jones for keeping it interesting.

  • Fightlinker

    hahaha, nice

  • Blackula Jonez

    Look at Mr. Polly with the literary lulz.

  • http://www.mattpolly.com matthewpolly

    what about the book, Cap?

  • frickshun

    Black–>that’s awesome.

    VoiceofReason–>Please shut the fuck up. We all get it. And Jon Jones is also the 1st person in the history of the world to be a hypocrite. In fact, that word didn’t exist til he hit the pole. I just found it in the “new” dictionary created 2 days ago.

Archives