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Kimbo done with this grappling and kicking bullshit, you queers

Kimbo made a name for himself throwing fists and only transitioned to MMA after EliteXC shoved a stimulus-sized check in his wallet. Now, the former Reality Kings bodyguard wants to head back to his roots, according to The Nassau Guardian (don’t worry — I didn’t think people in the Bahamas knew how to write, either).

Bahamian Mixed Martial Arts (MMA) professional fighter Kevin ‘Kimbo Slice’ Ferguson, speaking exclusively with The Nassau Guardian yesterday, disclosed plans to venture into the professional boxing arena as soon as his contract is fulfilled.

The 35-year-old 6’2″, 235-pound phenomenon expressed these intentions on Monday, a day before returning to his Miami, Florida based home. Ferguson became a household name after signing a professional contract with Showtime’s EliteXC in 2007. Before that, he gained notoriety on the underground fighting scene through the Internet.

“Boxing is really my first desire. I have a lot of love for it and believe I can do pretty well. [The sport of] MMA is somewhat of a project for me. Boxing is one dimensional while there are a lot of dimensions in MMA. I don’t think it would be a hard transition from MMA to stand-up boxing because of my fighting style,” noted Ferguson, who has brought international prestige to The Bahamas through his MMA exploits.

I thoroughly enjoy how the writer says Kimbo brought “international prestige to the Bahamas.” While Kimbo seems like a nice enough guy, saying that he brought “prestige” to the Bahamas for cage fighting is like saying that Sarah Palin brought “prestige” to Alaska after running for Vice President or that Dustin Diamond brought “prestige” to former Saved by the Bell cast members after appearing on Celebrity Fit Club. No. Just ….. no.