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Mismatches ahoy for EliteXC’s third CBS show

The televised portion of EliteXC’s third CBS show is now locked in, and here’s what you’re getting:

Shaw indicated that as of now, the Cyborg vs. Takahashi matchup is not guaranteed to make the CBS telecast, which is only guaranteed to show bouts between Kimbo Slice vs. Ken Shamrock, Gina Carano vs. Kelly Kobald-Gavin, Jake Shields vs. Paul Daley, and Murilo “Ninja” Rua vs.Benji Radach.

As usual, you’ve got an event where all the fights are stacked in favor of EliteXC’s stars. Don’t even get me started on Kimbo Slice vs Ken Shamrock fight. While Ken might have finally been booked against the only dude left in professional MMA who might fall to one of his leg locks, I doubt Bas Rutten (who felt a few Shamrock locks firsthand) will leave that hole open for exploitation. This fight is so unconscionable that even Gary Shaw said “Oh no, I couldn’t do that!” This is Gary fucking Shaw we’re talking about! If you’ve already got your dictionary out to look up ‘unconscionable’, then look up ‘Sketchy promoter who’d put his own mother in a ring to make a buck’ and you’ll see his photo next to it.

And while Kelly Kobald is talking some good smack and is a decent fighter, I just don’t think she has what it takes to beat Gina Carano. Looking past her 16-2 record, you realize that 14 of those wins were against fighters with barely existent records. 10 of them only have the one loss against Kobald on their record, and the others sport 0-3 or 1-1 records. Personally, I’m impressed that Kelly’s management was able to feed her noobs for so long. Who would agree to fight someone who has 10+ wins on their record as their first fight? Retarded.

EliteXC has another night that will probably be very flashy and will probably result in the right people winning. Good for them. Me? I’m gonna watch and cross my fingers that one of the sacrificial lambs pulls off the upset and throws a monkey wrench in the plan. Because I’m just an anarchist at heart, I guess.