twitter google

MMA in the Olympics would suck

Eugh, I feel so dirty. Not minutes after I talked about the IFL being dumb for competing with the UFC over Feb 29 / March 1st weekend, I stumbled upon a Kevin Iole article where he said the same fucking thing. Agreeing with Kevin certainly makes me feel very strange, although I suppose considering the amount of garbage we both spew it was bound to happen sooner or later.

To cleanse my palate of this situation, I’ve decided to take something else he wrote about in his article and shit on it. One of his readers was asking about the idea of MMA as an Olympic sport and Kevin said ‘it was an idea that made sense’. LOL HES SO STUPID!!!11

I would really like to know exactly how in hell MMA would work at the Olympics. God knows they totally vagina-cized boxing, turning it into four 2 minute rounds with opponents wearing gigantor sparring helmets. If the people running the Olympics think boxing is too brutal, I can’t even imagine how they would react to MMA.

Better to just try and get submission grappling or something in there, or how about actually paying attention to the disciplines of MMA already included, like wrestling or Judo? Wha? Huh? You’ve never checked that out? Yeah, I forgot that no one actually cares about the Olympics any more.

Bonus Factual Error by Kevin: Kevin claimed “The number one sticking point for Fedor was money. Secondarily, he wanted to compete in the World Sambo Championship and the UFC didn’t want to allow it.” Of course, anyone who isn’t a shit for brains UFC lackey knows that the UFC was offering the most money, but their contract was brutally restrictive and had clauses which forced Fedor to renew his contract indefinitely if he was champion, plus allowed the UFC to dump him at any time for any reason. In short, it was the “Bend over and take it like a bitch” contract, not money.

Super bonus shill points go to whoever sent in this ‘question’ to Iole’s mailbag:

Kevin, I just wanted to rave about your articles. I love how they are crisp and flow the way they do. I’m a huge fan of MMA (since the mid-90’s) and read everything I can get my hands on. Your work is probably the best on the subject. We just seem to get a little more info in your articles than with other writers on the subject. Your last story “Always a Fighter” with Wanderlei Silva was great.

I wish I could say I was the one who wrote this and it was all a big joke to celebrate Opposite Day, where you say the exact opposite of whatever you really mean to say. But alas, I have to hope some other trickster beat me to the punch. Otherwise let this be proof that the human race is getting dumber.

  • Lifer

    well you can rest easy knowing your opinion was birthed from the perspective of a knowledgeable mma fan whilst his was more or less sycophantic UFC worship.

  • Toxie

    You forgot the disclaimer.

  • Accomando

    “…We just seem to get a little more info in your articles than with other writers on the subject…”

    Translation: You must give D. White good BJ’s.

    Also, I think Iole wrote this to himself.

  • suspiria

    “God knows they totally vagina-cized boxing”

  • Mobb Deep

    Yeah, Olympic MMA would suck, but they seriously need to get some submission grappling in there. That would be awesome.

  • ajadoniz


  • MoreThanUFC

    Iole wrote that himself. No doubt about it. If the “writer” has been watching MMA for as long as I have, ie the mid-90s, then the “writer” would know Iole doesnt know an asshole from a keyhole.

  • Michaelthebox

    I find it pretty funny that you take Vadim’s uber-corrupt ass seriously when it comes to the UFC contract terms, but ignore what the UFC said about Vadim’s ridiculous demands.

  • vess

    I agree with the Kevin Iole sycophant.

  • vess

    How about a MMA Triathlon for the Olympics?

    1) Striking: boxing, kickboxing, karate, muay thai
    2) Clinch: sambo, greco-roman, judo
    3) Grappling: jits, freestyle

  • fightlinker

    Oh, we’ve ripped on the russians a lot on this site. But if you want to know why Fedor turned down the offer, ask fedor :-p What he considers is pretty important, since that’s his POV

  • ilostmydog

    Anyone who believes what Fedor said about the contract needs his or her head examined. You could tell it was complete bullshit when he said his contract didn’t allow him to do endorsements or interviews. Furthermore, Fedor, by his own admission, wasn’t even involved in his own contract negotiations so all he fucking knows is what Vadim told him.

  • Archivist

    That Kevion Iole fanmail excerpt made me nauseous. It had all the nutritional value of a friggin Happy Meal, much like what Quadros wrote about himself on his wikipedia profile. When it comes to coked-out delusion, i sure miss Jerry Millen *sigh*

  • Xavier

    Ask Fedor? Like Fedor knows much other than “I say nice things about Putin and live” and “They give me easy fight, I like.”

    You’re fucking crazy to think Fedor knows jack shit about that contract. He just knows that Finklestein tells him.

  • fightlinker

    You want the russian peep’s side of the story, you ask them. They might be ‘wrong’, but i have no doubt in my mind that they think they’re right and that’s the reason they didn’t agree to the contract. To them it wasn’t about money.

  • Swedish guy

    I enjoy that you explained “Opposite day”.
    Otherwise, somewhere, someone would’ve sat down going “WTF does dude mean by opposite day?!”

  • P W

    MMA as an Olympic sport? You guys are about 2000 years late. Ever heard of pankration?