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OMFG Royce tests positive!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh woe is me. I wake up this morning to learn the direst of news: Royce Gracie failed his K1 Dynamite drug test. This is like learning that Abe Lincoln put Ecstasy up his ass at ye olde rave, or George Washington freebased coke with whores in the Oval Office. From Sherdog:

Mixed martial arts icon Royce Gracie (Pictures), best known as the slender gi-wearing Brazilian who twisted oversized competitors into knots during the early days of the Ultimate Fighting Championship, tested positive for traces of Nandrolone, a commonly used anabolic steroid, following his decision win over Kazushi Sakuraba (Pictures), June 2 in Los Angeles, the California State Athletic Commission revealed Thursday.

Of course, things aren’t too grim. There’s tons of room for the Gracie family to get out of this little predicament. The fact this this was only ‘traces’ of Nandrolone mean Royce can claim a supplement he used contained the stuff unknowingly (the Vitor Belfort defense). Nandrolone can also be naturally occurring in the body under a bunch of different circumstances (the Tour de France defense). And of course finally we can just say Armando Garcia is a fucking wad and we don’t trust anything he says (the tinfoil hat defense).

But one thing is for sure: that guy we used to have a lot of respect for but now we don’t anymore because he’s one dimensional egomaniac and was never really that good in the first place because he was fighting when no one know anything about jiu-jitsu? He just lost our respect.

  • Jonathan

    I am going with the tinfoil hat defense theory, as Garcia is a tool.

  • http://www.fightlinker.com fightlinker

    To me, it just doesn’t make any sense. My bet is supplement contamination. What can i say, in the end i’m a Royce nuthugger.

  • Mike O

    i’m going to go with the super tinfoil hat theory, and say this was somehow arranged for sakuraba to save face

  • http://www.fightlinker.com fightlinker

    skin cream, vasoline, and steroids oh my!

  • Asa

    …because he’s one dimensional egomaniac and was never really that good in the first place because he was fighting when no one know anything about jiu-jitsu?

    Thank you. I thought I was the only one. Although I do respect him for finishing what Bruce started oh so many years ago, and for being a very very good Jiu-Jitsu player.

  • GonzoDamon

    You know what, I AM PISSED OFF!!! The TRUTH is that Royce Gracie didn’t add much of shit to MMA. He was the weaker of the family, so Rorion and Helio came to the decision to make him the display of the power of Jiu-Jitsu. Royce didn’t choose his role as BJJ integrator and the fact of the matter is that if it wasn’t Royce, or a Gracie at all for that matter, BJJ would have still made a splash on the fighting circuit and someone else would have made a name for himself/his family. There is even strong speculation that Rorion paid fighters to take a dive in the name of BJJ. Not only that, but Royce’s opponents WERE NOT the top fighters in their discipline. I think that Rorion choose them based on their size. That way, when their little skinny man won, it would look like BJJ was dominant in absolution, even against much stronger and larger opponents!

    EARLY MMA=MARKETING PLAN FOR “GRACIE JIU-JITSU”!!

    Royce, you are a self-centered, egotistical, bean pole, douche of a one-dimensional fighter. It’s not even that he’s too BJJ-centric to branch out, it’s that he’s too damned hard-headed and pompous to realize that his family martial art isn’t the end-all, be-all! Don’t even get me started on the Gracie’s stealing Judo and renaming it into something that there family could market and make a living on.

    Screw you, Royce! You never added that much to MMA in the first place. Now you have done AS MUCH OR MORE damage to MMA than you ever, supposedly, contributed in the first place.

    I love that this fight will now be called a NO CONTEST. Sakuraba just basically showed up for the fight, didn’t work to end the fight, and WON, as far as the records, WITHOUT HAVING TO TRY!!! I love it! Royce assumed that he has taken revenge for his family and made them proud, but what he really did was tarnish the name of GRACIE!

    HA! Haha! HA!

  • Mike O

    I say lets make steroids legal. any kind of physical enhancement should be legal for fighters. lets take it to the next level. I want to see hyper fast muscular freaks mauling each other and tearing off each others limbs.

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