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On the UFC ring girls

Not a day goes by where someone doesn’t post a comment on one of our many mean posts regarding UFC ring girls. These posts usually follow the below formula:

  • They question our sexuality (actually, I’d trust a homo’s opinion on a girl’s looks more than a straight guy’s)
  • They say we’ve never had sex with anyone nearly that hot (for all our hideousness here at Fightlinker, we’ve managed to trick quite a few very hot chicks into nookie with us)
  • Add in something about us being immature / jealous somehow (immature yes, jealous … not somuch)

For a textbook example, you can go check out Luke Thomas’ recent post on Bloodyelbow, which is pretty much par for the course.

They’re tinier than I imagined they’d be, but I’m also fairly tall. And I’m sure they are boring people who haven’t had to work on their personality because they’ve gotten by on their good looks. And maybe they are boring in the sack. Who knows? What I do know is that they are incredibly attractive and if you don’t find them attractive, you are most certainly a homosexual. Nothing’s wrong with being gay, just understand who you are. Edith and Arianny appeal to a cheap, doll-like aesthetic, but it’s one that my hormones respond to. I see both (particularly Edith) take a beating about how they look, but the truth is the people doing that have never hooked up or bed down with a woman who looks even half as good. And if they were to bed down with either of them, they probably wouldn’t know what to do.

I do kinda enjoy how he assumes they’re vapid, which to me is a lot more insulting than anything we’ve ever said about their looks. We’ve made fun of the girls in the past for stupid comments during interviews, but we’ve never given them a blanket statement on being dumb. We don’t judge a book by it’s cover … we just judge a cover on it’s cover. Anyways, I just want to address the whole looks thing:

There’s basically two tiers of hotness at any time: actual hotness and relative hotness. You judge the girls you meet on actual hotness … this actual hotness is how you judge if you wanna date them or sleep with them or whatever else you happen to do with girls. On the other hand there’s relative hotness, which is what you use to judge models, actresses, and other ‘celebrity’ figures. In this case you’re comparing them to other girls in the same range. It’s relative, the same way you don’t judge pro fighters on their ability to beat you up, you judge them on their ability against other pro fighters.

So while Edith Larente may not be ugly, she’s waaaay the fuck down the list of hot ring girls, being beaten out by pretty much every girl in the UFC, WEC, Cage Rage, and even a whole bunch of regional promotions. She rates down there with the EliteXC dancers, who at least have the excuse that they’re probably hired for their ‘dancing skills’ (aka willingness to deal with Jared Shaw) and not their looks.

Just thought I’d clear all that up.

  • Accomando

    You really didn’t need to.

    Puke proved how stupid he was in that moronic post of his. Confirming that BloodyElbow completely sucks.

    “…I do kinda enjoy how he assumes they’re vapid, which to me is a lot more insulting than anything we’ve ever said about their looks…”

    That was the best part IMO as well. Wow, what a fucken tool/hypocrite he is.

  • fightlinker

    Luke’s my boy, and I’m not gonna get bent out of shape regarding a post about ring girls. I can understand the whole “Why you bashing these girls, they ain’t that bad” angle, but on the other hand they’re paid to be hot, just like fighters are paid to fight well. So when a fighter isn’t fighting well, we bash him. And when ring girls aren’t all that hot, we bash them too ;-) Equal opportunity bashing all around!

  • Accomando

    The arrogance in his post was a little too heavy, even for me; and trust me, that’s sayin’ somethin’.

    He needed to be bashed. I am content now, and I’ll still probably click on his crappy blog tomorrow anyway.

  • HexRei

    fightlinker is GAY

  • HexRei

    Oh, and you guys definitely haven’t and never will fuck anyone near that hot, unless you sell this site and use the proceeds to hire an escort :)
    sorry, it’s just the truth. stop fronting.

  • HexRei

    ok, here’s the big question fightlinker: based solely on her physical attributes, who’s hotter:

    Roxy Moderaffi or Edith?


  • JoshMan

    They are both hideous in their latest pics on the site. Having a cock and not being a fag, I would bone both of them anyway. Still funny to rag on Edith.

  • fightlinker

    Well, first off I don’t find Edith hot … she’s pretty much the embodiment of everything i don’t like about what’s considered ‘hot’ right now. She’s overprocessed, has retarded bazooka breasts, looks like she’s been under the knife face-wise, and wears too much makeup. Past that point from what I know about her she seems to have a shitty attitude. Oh and the fact that she used to work as an escort is also pretty gross.

    As for Edith vs Roxy, it’s not at all the same thing. I’m attracted to Roxy because she’s smart, funny, and has already accomplished so much at such a young age. To me, that makes her 1000x hotter than Edith. On the other hand, if you’re asking me who’s a better candidate for mindlessly circling the octagon with a placard? Then yes, Edith wins there. Good for her ;-)

    As for not sleeping with hotter girls, I don’t feel the need to brag about my past exploits. Suffice to say I spent the past 10 years as a rave DJ playing around the world, which pulls tail just as well as being a fighter.

    But I have no problem pointing out that Jacob has slept with way hotter AND way smarter. Most of the girls he managed to sleep with could have been models if they weren’t busy getting phds.

  • Xavier

    “So while Edith Larente may not be ugly”

    What about the fact that she is, in fact, ugly?

  • xtremefightster

    Even Gina@heavyweight>Edith

  • Jemaleddin

    Can we focus on what’s important here? The salient facts are:

    Edith had a price list on a website.
    There’s no cure for Hepatitis.
    There’s no vaccine for AIDS.
    Herpes is forever.
    Gonorrhea can leave your junk screwed up forever.

    We can talk about whether or not she’s pretty, but that’s a question of taste. Let’s focus on the fact that she’s a public health risk.

  • Jemaleddin

    Oh, and yeah Roxy totally. Cute, funny, fit, smart – she’s the total package. That beats some creepy dead-behind-the-eyes escort any day.

    Plus I wouldn’t be scared to walk down dark streets at night with her holding my hand. I could finally leave my house… Uh, never mind.

  • Lifer

    i enjoy his blanket statement regarding the sexuality of anyone so bold as to not be attracted to some plastic surgery monster. luke thomas, you don’t like her looks, you like the plastic woman look she’s trying to attain because it has an effect on certain male demographic. who knows what she actually looked like before??

    also how can you lump arianny and edith into the same group? it doesnt look to me like arianny’s been under the knife and if she has she at least had the good sense not to go for torpedo tits. i don’t think anyone’s talking about arianny being gross, i’ve only heard disparaging remarks about the elite prostitute that’s now strutting her stuff around the cage.

    anyways yeah, my generalization will be that anyone attracted to that fake hollywood, struggling pornstar look is a complete moron, weak of mind and highly suggestible. shame on you for supporting the plastic surgery industry which, no doubt, causes places much emotional distress and undeserved pressure to conform on the hearts and minds of impressionable young women around the world.

  • frickshun

    Linker, when I read Luke’s post I busted out laughing. I couldn’t believe he would waste space addressing it. Since he “gently” bashed you for supposedly taking credit for the 3 hr Fight Night, I have lost interest in his posts. In fact, I registered just to reply to him. HE DELETED THE POST LIKE A BITCH. I didn’t even rant, just rebutted saying you never took credit. Anyway, I saw Horseface in Vegas in February. Although she looks better in person, there’s s’thing about her that just doesn’t do it for me. She’s the type of girl I’d like to degrade in bed though. I’d like her to leave after w/mascara running down her cheeks.

  • MadMan

    Cut the girl some slack.
    Do you realize how many dicks she had to suck
    to pay for all of that silicon & callogen.

  • Accomando


    Not surprising at all.

  • Jemaleddin

    I dunno, I got all up in Luke’s shit a while back talking about his low percentage with fight picking, and while he got shitty with me, he didn’t delete my posts.

    He did however say, “And do you train, sir? I don’t think you do.” Which is kinda low, you know? I don’t think most of the bookies setting the odds train. Heck, most of the guys writing for his site don’t train. And it obviously doesn’t help with picking winners. :-)

  • fightlinker

    I’ve always felt that if you ain’t causing arguments, you’re not saying much worth reading ;-)

  • danaunclefesterwhite

    Edith has hideously large fake tits.
    She’s an anorexic “alt” type whore.
    She has a horse face.
    She probably has either chlamydia, gonorrhea, syphilis or HPV. One, more or all of them.

    Arianny and Ali may not be clean (Edith for sure has more STDs than these two put together though) and they are sluts too (what with them fucking the talent) but they don’t have that fake, sleazy look so I’d hit it, STD tests pending. Rachelle Leah is the best one looks-wise and class-wise.

  • Captain

    I think this whole thing has gotten taken a little too seriously. Jokes are jokes. Luke and other young’ns need not get bent out of shape and you need not justify your jokes.

    As for me, I think Edith is hot. But I like her horseface and big fake boobs. I think Roxy’s hot too. I like her glasses. Want to see her dolled up with her hair down. Grrr…

    Rave DJ, that fuckin cracks me up.

  • Big D D

    Oh I bet those rave girls were sexy as hell…yum I love my fuck buddy to be drugged up on something that the DEA hasn’t even heard of yet…I mean I bet most men could get a chick on X to sleep with them..right?

    IMO… fake breasts = mental problems

  • Ryan
  • x5BoltMainx

    You’re all forgetting the most important thing…..Roxy is flexible & a fighter…..meaning ROUGH SEX!!!

  • asa

    Edith is the postergirl for Botox Gone Wrong.

    I’m surprised at how Stage One his thinking on this matter was. While yours was far more intelligently developed and avoided the word “cunt.”

    In fact, I’m sure you guys wrote each other’s posts in an attempt to plant seeds for a feud that’ll build for a sphincter-repairing year!

    Or he has shitty taste in broads.