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Welp, my adventures in Reno betting didn’t go all that well but that’s how the cookie crumbles when you’re throwing money down on underdogs. That doesn’t mean the night was a complete wash – there were a decent amount of great fights sandwiched between a few dogs (Silverio / Zeferino, I’m looking at you fuckers) and some great finishes to boot. Below you’re watching Junior Hernandez go to sleep via a RNC from Lucas Martins – the only finish from the prelims. After the jump, some of the best stoppages from the main card.

(gifs via Zombie Prophet, our unofficial source for gifs when we’re on the road and can’t make our own)

Continue after the Jump ››

Glover Teixeira Scares the Shit Out of Everyone, May Be Doing Some Kind of Voodoo

It’s funny how after 19 straight wins, people still doubted that Glover Teixeira was and is a supernatural being. To find the length of his winning streak, it’s long been easier to take the total number of fights in his career and subtract all since his last loss than to actually count his consecutive wins. But it’s amazing what getting caught illegally immigrating to America can do: the resulting visa problems can harm one’s career for quite some time, even though the “but come on, he kicks too much ass” argument is eventually likely to prevail. For years, Teixeira was out of sight and out of mind in the US to all but those who could stand to listen to the heavily padded esophagi of Shitdog Radio.

So it’s no surprise that my colleague Ryan, and some of his wide-eyed compatriots, continued to bet against Teixeira even after a 4-fight UFC win streak. The funny thing is that certain people have fished for bad things to say about Teixeira, calling him “slow” and noting that he does take damage. Some doubted his top-end power after he couldn’t put away Quinton Jackson. What those people fail to take into account is the fact that during his exile from the US, Teixeira was obviously anointed by a shaman or something to give him a magic fucking touch that makes him unstoppable despite any logic suggesting the contrary.

Now that he put Ryan Bader away after yawning off severe brain damage and has earned a title shot after 20 straight wins, airport security in America will probably constantly be searching him for shrunken heads, using TSA regulations against transporting dead bodies to save the rest of the light heavyweight division on a technicality. They need to do this, as there is technically no prohibition on in-cage witchcraft. Either that, or they could drug test him twice a week for the rest of his career a-la Larry Allen in an attempt to drain the fluids that give him his zombie power.

Burkman v. Carl for WSOF welterweight championship

It’s been a busy week in MMA, and it all culminates today with one spectacular event: the World Series of Fighting’s announcement that it will award its first championship belt in October.

Josh Burkman and Steve Carl will vie for the welterweight strap at World Series of Fighting 6 on Oct. 26 in Coral Gables, inaugurating a title that will no doubt be contested in several thrilling scraps over decades of peaceful coexistence with Major League Baseball.

“I think that matchup will be something special,” WSOF President Ray Sefo said. “The whole lineup we’re planning will be fantastic, and I look forward to making more announcements very soon.”

The card will co-feature a bantamweight fight between Carson “Little Juggernaut” Beebe and Marlon Moraes, as well as Dan Lauzon versus undefeated lightweight Justin “Gidget” Gaethje. The main card will air live on NBC Sports Network beginning at 9pm. As of press time, Gaethje has not agreed to his nickname.

Burkman (26-9 MMA) is 8-1 since leaving the UFC, with a 41-second submission win over Jon Fitch in June. WSOF’s press release describes him as a “resurgent veteran.” His opponent is an actual veteran; Carl (20-3 MMA) began fighting in the Modern Army Combatives Program and trains with Team Hard Drive in Cedar Rapids, Iowa.

You have not partied until you’ve partied with Team Hard Drive in Cedar Rapids, Iowa. Also, Burkman’s post-UFC win streak can be read two ways.

It might say that the UFC is too quick to let go of underperforming talent. Burkman was 5-2 in the big show before he hit the dreaded three-fight losing streak, which included a split decision in a headliner to Mike Swick. His impressive record since is a testament to his determination, but it might also testify to the gap in competition between the UFC and other promotions.

Sefo and the World Series of Fighting are working hard to sell the other narrative. In the post-Pride, post-Strikeforce, post-arm-wrestling-with-punching era of mixed martial arts, WSOF believes there are enough talented welterweights outside the UFC to make a division. Godspeed, Ray Sefo. Godspeed.

Dan Brooks writes about politics, culture and lying at Combat! blog.

 

 

Long shots and dark horses

Back in the day when America was free and you could bet on fights online, I used to run a column for BetUS called ‘The Underdog’s Guide to UFC Fight Night 69′ or whatever that month’s particular event was. Basically, I’m a sucker for a long shot with some sweet odds attached, and I shared my uneducated enthusiasm for questionable betting with the world on a regular basis. Today I return with another edition, but with a little twist: I’m sitting in a casino in Reno Nevada and am actually putting my money where my mouth is. My much smarter buddy Damon once told me the best way to make money gambling on fights is off small edges on favorites. Let’s ignore that advice and get crazy with the underdogs!

Continue after the Jump ››

Anthony Pettis to Fight TJ Grant Next; Fighters Still Considered Pussies

When Fightlinker wrote such headlines as “Dana White Says Jose Aldo’s Manager Makes Him Look Like a Pussy” and “UFC’s Accusations of Pussitude Succeed, Jose Aldo Willing to Fight Anthony Pettis at 155,” I was expecting the next headline to be “Jose Aldo–Anthony Pettis Title Unification Bout Booked.” But it turns out that in fact, Dana White just needed some recreational pussy calling on that particular day: instead of leveraging Aldo’s vaginitis into true superfight, the UFC has taken its usual approach, promising TJ Grant the next shot at the lightweight title and leaving a readymade superfight on the table.

The rationale for this was simply that TJ Grant “was next,” even though that logic never got Karo Parisyan his shot, which later drove Parisyan completely insane. But there are probably several other underlying reasons for the choice of Grant as well. Maybe, to rub things into Aldo manager Andre Perdeirneras’ face for being difficult, the UFC decided to give Aldo a smaller fight—one less likely to pay him any Pay-Per-View (PPV) points—as a superfight may be the only big seller of any fight card carried by him at this point. PPV points are usually only paid on buys over a certain number, like 300,000, so Aldo’s recent fight with Chan Sung Jung that failed to draw even 200,000 buys probably wouldn’t have guaranteed him any payouts beyond his base fight purse and win bonus.

Perhaps White and Company decided to let Aldo stew in the never never land of fishy odor and low PPV buyrates for another few months while they either build up Pettis as a dominant champion or replace him with Grant, whose extreme size would probably make a cut to 145 impossible and any discussion of such moot. And maybe this announcement is just a trial balloon, and the UFC really has no idea what it will do with Pettis because his knee may have gone bust. The original tweet by Kevin Iole confirming that Grant is being given the shot also confirmed that Pettis’ knee MRI results are still unclear. We’ll see what matchup is actually made when the timetable for Pettis’ knee is established, and until then, Fightlinker will wait with baited breath to see which two of the three fighters will fight; the other, by UFC musical chairs logic, will be unanimously declared a pussy anew.

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