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Yeah, I know you all love it when I go “haute couture” on your ass. But fuck y’all. These are some ugly ass shoes!

When Miguel Cotto enters the ring to face Sugar Shane Mosley on Saturday night, he will do it on firm footing. The WBA welterweight champion will be wearing a super hi-tech boxing boot with a special sole made out of a Michelin rubber compound specifically designed to channel liquid away from the shoe to prevent Cotto’s feet from slipping on the slick ring canvas advertisements that often cause boxers problems. In addition, the boot is supposed to provide maximum traction, allowing Cotto to firmly plant his feet before unleashing his power punches.

Yeah fucking right. So basically they’ve replaced the soles of his shoes with tire rubber. Too bad Cotto’s not a fucking car and tires are designed to push liquid away while rolling, not stepping.

Someone get this guy a thesaurus! Big thanks to BloodyElbow for this vid … where would I steal content if not from them????

Seems like Ken Pavia is the guy to go to when you get the boot from the UFC. Sean Salmon is also with him and has had 9 fights this year. And while it’s taken a little while for the Babalu train to start rolling, looks like he’s got a good number of fights coming up:

  • Xcess Fighting (the guys who just did the Mark Kerr fight) on Dec. 12 vs. TBA
  • Hardcore Fighting Championship (Canadian guys who brough Aleks E) on Feb. 1 vs. TBA
  • Strikeforce 205 lb. 4 man Tournament in March

No, I am not joking:

I’m also taking applications for people who want to stay in my apartment building for 5-14 days to do personal training and Lifefood Nutritional Fasting.

Just what is Lifefood Nutritional Fasting? It’s another crackpot concept by Luke Cummo’s retard nutritionist Dr Jubb. Who the fuck is Dr Jubb? Here’s a few choice quotes about him:

David Jubb, PhD, is a well known Raw Foodist from New York City. He is originally from Australia, and he claimed at the time to be a “Breatharian.” At the time of this interview in November of 2002 he was telling people that he had not eaten anything for like 6 years or something like that. Personally, I doubted his story completely, and from what I heard from other people, it just was not so.

And here’s another story about Jubb:

The baby son of a urine-drinking East Village health guru to the stars has been taken from his father’s care because the dad failed to bring the boy to a doctor for a fractured ankle. Instead, David Jubb treated the 20-month-old’s fractures by crafting a brace out of chopsticks.

“He did not follow [Administration for Children's Services] instructions to bring the child to the doctor,” said a Family Court source.

I’m all down with Luke Cummo … he’s one of my favorite fighters in the UFC because he’s such a creepy motherfucker. But his nutritional choices are a bit scary, and I do worry that he’s using Dr Jubb’s Lifefood plan to feed his newborn, which is terrifying to say the least. Hey, people are allowed to raise their children however they want. I’m just saying don’t be surprised when this kid grows up to be a barely five feet tall grey skinned mutant.

It wouldn’t be a day in the life of Evan Tanner if something didn’t go wrong. Beware the day you’re with Evan Tanner at 11:55PM and he says “This has been the greatest day of my life!” Because 5 minutes later, a fucking meteor will fall on him, and it’d be best if you weren’t nearby when it hits.

Like a moonshine chaser after a smooth beer, Evan’s triumphant “I just got signed” day has now been tainted with “Some jackhole stole shit from my unlocked car“:

I’m really disappointed. I had some things stolen out of my Land Cruiser last night while it was parked in front of the gym. The UFC had just given me a brand new workout bag full of shirts and beanies, with a personalized engraved name tag. They took that. What I’m most upset about though, is that they took all of my mma trading cards that I sign for the fans and the kids. Come on now, that’s really uncool.

Evan then says “My car will be unlocked again tonight at the gym, please return the things you took.” Ten bucks says the car stereo will be gone tomorrow. I know Evan’s used to boats and I’m unsure if boats have locks on them … but fuck, man! Lock up your shit! You’re in Vegas, sin city, hobo central.

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