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I have to wonder if the producers of The Apprentice : Celebrity Edition had a whole bunch of different takes of Tito Ortiz for this commercial. And just for shits and giggles, they decided to pick the one where he sounded like a complete and utter retard. If you think his speech at the end was a bit weird, just see how it reads:

I’m Tito Ortiz. People are used to see me in the Octagon competing using my physical skills. Well then this Apprentice when I do win it I will be using my mental skills to show that I’m number 1.

This post took me a bit of extra time to write because when I plugged that quote into Microsoft Word the grammar checker exploded and my laptop caught fire.

I’m just gonna warn you now: don’t watch the above video unless you’re into seeing people’s legs broken backwards and sideways. This is just to give you some context for the below information on the upcoming Pancrase NYE-ish show:

Also on the same card, Japanese female fighter Windy Tomomi (Pictures) is set to return for the first time since her accident at Bodog Fight Costa Rica on Feb. 17.

Tomomi, who had an ankle badly broken during her fight with Rosi Sexton, went through five surgeries and several months of rehabilitation in Japan before she was discharged from the hospital in June. Since then, Tomomi started back with light training and physical therapy before officially announcing her return to the ring.

So for those of you keeping count, she took 10 months to recover from this injury and step back into the ring. Now that is fucking hardcore. I think it’d have taken me 10 months just to stop screaming hysterically that MY FUCKING LEG SNAPPED IN HALF. Now excuse me while I go drink a few litres of milk.

Lots of people say ignorance is bliss … unless you’re a mixed martial artist. Then ignorance gets your ass kicked. There’s no better example of this than Cheick Kongo, who somehow thinks he’s got a decent ground game:

IWF: People have said that your ground game needs work. How are you working to improve it?
Kongo: I got nothing to prove. All those who know me know I’m a great wrestler. I’m not BJJ but I’m great.

IWF: Do you think that the people who criticize you like this are justified?
Kongo: Nobody knows me like my training partners and my coach, so shut up! Hahaha!

Yes, Kongo: Hahaha indeed! Hahaha as any fighter with a decent ground game takes you down and twists you into a pretzel! Hahaha losing is funny! Hahaha your training partners and coaches are lying to you if they say you’ve got a good ground game. Hahaha!

Also tucked into this interview: the hint that it might be Kongo facing Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira for the vacant HW belt, not Tim Sylvia:

IWF: Can you confirm the rumored fight between you and Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira?
Kongo: I will confirm this when I got the contract signed-lol-be patient.

Plus ten points for the ‘LOL’, man. I like Kongo, and when I heard he was training at Big Bear with Quinton Jackson a while back, I took heart in the idea that the dude was at least getting a good ground defense on. But I haven’t seen much to say he’s anywhere near ready to hang with anyone born in South America, let alone Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira.

Some people just have way too much time on their hands. Way too much AWESOME time. The last 10 seconds are my favorite.

I know it’s been kinda obvious, but I’m in a bad fucking mood today. Is it because I was rolling with the smelliest guy at the gym during last night’s BJJ class and I still reek of him (dispite 3 showers)? Yes, partly. But I’m also pissed that the ‘biggest news’ to come out today in MMA-Land is that Michael Bisping has decided to drop to middleweight.

BIG FUCKING SURPRISE. November called and wants it’s news back.

This is about the most obvious news ever … word was that Joe Silva watched Evans gas and Bisping get pushed around and told them both to take their chubby asses to middleweight. This doesn’t just help those two, it’ll also help the UFC’s shitty MW division, which could use a couple of TUF fighters who aren’t going anywhere fast. Oh wait … that pretty much sums up the MW division’s problem. Never mind!

The move will definitely be better for Bisping than for Evans. All Bisping had waiting for him in the LHW division was a beating from Matt Hamill. No upside if he managed to win, and plenty of downside if he lost. If Evans decides to stick around to lose against Tito again, at least it gives him another high profile fight before he fades into obscurity down the line. Plus, Evans doesn’t seem like the kind of guy who likes cutting weight or diet. Or training hard. Or doing cardio.

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