(above: Cecil Peoples performing his infamous karate-chop chicken dance)

Let’s get one thing straight: Matt Hamill won that fight. Michael Bisping knew it. The crowd knew it. Everyone watching knew it. Hamill spent the first two rounds pushing Bisping around the octagon and bouncing him off the cage. Bisping couldn’t seem to get his head around the way Matt was pushing forward, and looked generally flustered the whole time. After the second round the Count was literally freaking out in his corner, refusing to sit down and yelling at his corner. He managed to get his shit together and make a case for winning the third round, but there’s no way he won the first two.

And then the judge’s decision. I have to admit this was a guilty pleasure for me … I’ve never had a screwjob benefit the fighter I wanted to win! Jeff Mullen had it 29-28 for Bisping … Doug Crosby had it 30-27 Hamill. At this point I thought to myself “Oh boy … Bisping really needs a dumb judge like Cecil Peoples to pull this out of the fire!” And lo and behold, as if summoned by my thoughts, Cecil Peoples rode in and saved the day: 29-28 Bisping!

To tell you the truth, I’m kind of shocked. You’d think Peoples would have been sympathetic to Hamill because they both have disabilities. Hamill of course is deaf, but not many seem to know that Peoples is blind. Ba-Dum-Tss! Actually, when I was looking for a pic of Cecil Peoples for this post I found an article that said he had a brain tumor. Which certainly explains a lot, but isn’t quite as funny as the ‘blind’ thing.

UPDATE: The official UFC article on the event has a different take on the scoring:

All three judges gave the first round to Hamill, with Bisping rebounding to win the next two on the cards of Jeff Mullen and Chris Watts. Judge Cecil Peoples was the lone dissenter, awarding all three rounds to Hamill.

Of course, I was basing my article off of what Bruce Buffer clearly said at the end of the fight. So now we’ve got Gerbasi vs Buffer as to who was right. I guess we’ll wait and see but i’ll trust the announcer reading the official decision over the guy who was probably playing adlibs on meth to have his articles ready by 11pm. Thanks for the heads up Euthyphro!

What the fuck is wrong with some people? First off you boo the hell out of fighters for being tentative or careful, but if they lose once or twice you dismiss them as done and over. Did you ever take a few damn seconds to think that maybe if a loss wasn’t considered such a cataclysmic event then maybe fighters would be more inclined to take risks and push the pace?

In my opinion this is the main difference between PRIDE and the UFC … in PRIDE, they don’t give a damn if you win or lose, it’s how entertaining the fight was. If you go down swinging, then you’ve got a lot of respect. But in the UFC, one or two wrong moves and you’re done. It’s not all that surprising to me that Crocop cracked under the pressure. That’s pretty much the story of his career … he just can’t seem to win the big ones. And considering all the pressure he was under to perform, this was definitely a ‘big one’.

In the past few hours I’ve read some pretty dumb shit from some pretty dumb people. And while I’m not going to defend Crocop’s performance tonight, I am going to defend his standing as one of the world’s top fighters. Talking about a top guy’s career being over after two losses is simply retarded. I wonder if they’ll do the same to Chuck Liddell if he loses to Keith Jardine. They certainly did it to Randy Couture over and over, and half the internet still brings up Couture’s slumps when trying to justify their position on ‘why Randy will lose this time’.

No one – especially not a hack like Kevin Iole – has the right to call Mirko Crocop washed up. No one has the right to say his career may be over. Those words are simply factually incorrect. Maybe three years down the road after a loss to Frank Mir pushes him out of the UFC and he’s fighting Tank Abbott on an Indian reservation. But now? Get a fucking grip, people.

Just like with Georges St Pierre, this will be the one time I’m going to bring this up. People on the internet talk and talk like what they’re saying actually matters … I may be a dick and I may talk shit but at least I don’t pretend like my blog channels through into reality. So I’ll sit back and watch more fights … and in 9 months we’ll see how Crocop is doing. I’ll make sure to remind everyone what they were saying after this fight just to show them how dumb they were.

Xyience is suing blogger Richard Bergeron of Unlimited Fight News. A while back Bergeron was spreading some pretty crackpot stories about Xyience being a front for swindling investors. Which is funny because I could have sworn Xyience was a front for selling bullshit nutritional supplements and making terrible commercials.

Here’s the things Bergeron accused Xyience of:

  • being investigated by the Securities and Exchange Commission
  • that there is a class action lawsuit against Xyience by it’s investors
  • that Xyience has ‘shell corporations’ which were basically slush funds for Xyience directors and board members.
  • that Xyience pays the UFC bogus sponsorship money and the UFC gives a portion of the money back to Xyience directors and board members.
  • that Xyience was created for the primary purpose of defrauding investors

These accusations were so outlandish and retarded that I didn’t even bother to repeat them … and I repeated that shit about Pat Miletich being an evil swinger! But wait – it gets better. Apparently, Xyience had problems with an investor who was going to invest fifteen million bucks in the company. The investor’s issue? Bergeron’s claims! Now that’s enough to get even the most laid back company ready to go to war.

Bergeron’s hilarious counter-movement to the lawsuit was to say “I live in Cape Cod, you filed in Nevada. No dice!” Hmm. Now I’m not a lawyer, but I’m pretty sure that argument doesn’t fly. But giving Bergeron the benefit of doubt, I’m sure the Xyience guys will find it really annoying to fly down to Cape Cod and file in the appropriate state. God knows they embezzle enough, I’m sure they can afford it.

Zach Arnold found it. Let’s get Sam Caplan to fight in it. I’ll take the reward. ‘Bangthechamp.com’ features a very unique format: two guys fight MMA-style, the winner gets to fuck the ring girl. Of course the site’s a total piece of shit … no good preview vids, no good pics … nothing to get yer nut off for free at all!

If you wanna see a preview video without visiting the nasty site, click here. Don’t worry, it’s ‘safe’ to watch … the bastards didn’t even give us a nipple or warty vag. Which in the end is why they’re not going to succeed with this parasitic attempt to piggy back off the success of MMA. Guys beating the shit out of each other to fuck a chick on video is immoral, degenerate, depraved, and vile. Which is why it would be a massive success, *if* the genius guys behind this loosened their damned fists and showed us some fights and some fucking for free.

God knows most of the UFC shirts out there are total shite, but I’ve noticed lately that their designs are getting a lot worse lately. It’s like the graphic designer has been … ‘afflicted’ with something. Afflicted with shitty tired repetitive graphic design, that is.

Featuring original art by renowned artist Richard T. Slone, the ”Ultimate King Premium” t-shirt is pre-washed multiple times with enzymes, then masterfully hand-grinded and sanded in select areas and expertly silk screened across the seams, creating the best look and feel the world. As a finishing touch, each shirt is hand-embellished with imported crystal rhinestones and hammered metal studs, each one individually placed.

Yep that’s right, the crown has actual fucking rhinestones in it. And there’s nothing manlier than wearing a shirt with imported crystal rhinestones. Hey, I’m willing to accept the UFC putting guns of all things on ultimate fighting shirts. But rhinestones? Where the hell is this going? What’s next … a line of purses?

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