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If a picture says a thousand words, how many words does an animated gif say? To me it says one: P0WNED@!

I woke up early this morning to watch the IFL Grand Prix replay. I was pretty hung over and figured “Well, I can’t feel more like shit than I already do”. Well, I was wrong. I don’t know how I keep getting tricked into watching IFL product … is it because I feel a responsibility to the readers of this site? Maybe. Am I just a glutton for punishment via poorly produced crap? Yeah, that sounds right.

Anyways, the event was pretty terrible … they used old IFL Battleground footage to fill in gaps in the show, which really destroyed the momentum between fights. Their ring announcer looked like a carnival barker and committed the cardinal sin of white suit jacket with black pants. For shame! And goddamn, I would pull out one of my teeth with a pair of pliers to never hear any of the schlocky IFL team music themes again. Last but not least, the belts were fucking SNAKESKIN DINNER PLATES THAT LOOKED LIKE THEY WERE MADE OF TIN.

The fights themselves were so/so. No decisions in the title matches, which was good. You just got the feeling though that the guys you were watching simply weren’t all that great. Of course it doesn’t help that I couldn’t give less of a shit about the IFL. I’d rather watch curling or cricket.

Anyways, on to the meat. The highlight of my morning was watching the replacement’s replacement Ryan Schultz absoultely destroy Chris Horodecki. The reason it was awesome? Because the IFL was all about Horodecki being their new breakout star, and he just got beat by a guy who’s lost to both Horodecki AND Bart Bart Palaszewski to boot.

Something tells me his reign isn’t going to last very long. In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if the IFL makes another mockery of the tournament and schedules an immediate rematch so their golden boy gets a second chance. Although considering the mean pounding Ryan gave Chris, maybe he does have what it takes to hold onto the strap. Not like I’m going to care … my new year’s resolution is to stop wasting my time covering the IFL unless I’m getting paid to do so.

I’ve had it about up to here with people putting their two cents in on who should retire and why. The biggest bullshit reason I keep hearing is for ‘the legacy’. Apparently Matt Hughes should retire to keep ‘his legacy’ intact. He’s not going to beat GSP for the belt unless Jesus appears in a vision and advises him to diversify, so what else is there really for him to do? Fight more lame / dangerous fights with people like Chris Lytle?

Well how about he does what he’s been talking about for a while and move to middleweight to challenge Anderson Silva? Oh yeah, how soon we all forget that he was talking about that back in February.

I’m not the boss of anyone, which is unfortunate because the route I see Matt Hughes following is way better than what’s probably going to actually happen. My advice is a break from fighting for half a year. He waits till Serra / GSP is settled, and then fights Serra. He’ll most likely win that bout, and that way he can leave the welterweight division on a win so lame internet douches like me can’t say he’s ‘running from the weight class with his tail tucked between his legs’.

And then he’s on to Anderson Silva. By then Silva will have beaten Dan Henderson and either Evan Tanner (believe!) or Yushin Okami. Matt Hughes will ride to the rescue and save us from a possible Silva vs Kampman or Marquardt 2.

Anyways, that’s just how I see it. I think Hughes is a dick but I love seeing him fight … so as long as he wants to keep fighting, I think he should. And I think everyone else should stop acting like he’s got nothing worthwhile left to do if he sticks around.

Turns out all the animosity that Chuck felt going into the fight with Wanderlei Silva wasn’t towards Wand himself, but rather jackhole Pride fans:

“I never had anything against Wanderlei, but it was those Pride fans who got me,” Liddell said. “They’re getting on me about not fighting the guy. I’m like, ‘I’m in UFC and he’s in Pride. What do you want me to do?’ I would have fought him in a backyard if I could have.”

I wouldn’t have minded that, especially if a backyard fight meant going until one of them was done. Dana White said he made the Hughes/St Pierre fight an interim fight and therefore 5 rounds because he didn’t want to see it go to a 3 round decision. Well, it’s too bad he couldn’t do the same with this fight, because while it was a great match regardless and everyone saw the writing on the wall for Wanderlei, I would have loved to see this one go another 10 minutes (if it would have).

So how great was this fight? It’s another fight that was carried by the anticipation and connections we brought into the fight with us. Just like Couture/Sylvia wasn’t that exciting if you removed it’s context, the same could be said for this fight. Chuck and Wand felt eachother out for half of the first two rounds. It reminded me of a stripper taking her time removing her top in the champaigne room. Goddamn it bitch, just take your clothes off and stick your clam in my face already! When strip club songs last all of three minutes, there’s no time for foreplay or feeling out!

Unlike most people, I’m not gonna say either fighter is anywhere close to being done. Chuck and Wand probably have a good 2-3 years left in the UFC, and I don’t doubt that we could be seeing them face off again in that time. Let’s just hope there’s a belt on the line so it lasts longer.

I said it during the radio show: I’m tired of sucking Steve Cofield’s balls all the time, but damnit … he shows you what a good reporter with solid MMA knowledge and legitimate press credentials can do. The latest example of this is a one on one interview with Dana White right after UFC79. Go here to listen to the full 10 minute audio, but here’s the bit that interested me the most:

“Couture is still the heavyweight champion, he’s going to have to honor his contract or retire. And I expect him to honor it, he’s Captain America, he’s an honorable guy. He’s took over a half a million dollars in signing money and he’s got two fights with me. So this is in the lawyer’s hands now and we’ll see what happens.”

Yeah, I know … the title of this post made everything sound a lot more positive than the actual quote. Basically it sounds like Randy is remaining the champion for legal reasons more than any other reason … as Fedor revealed in an interview, being a champion in the UFC kinda sucks because it locks you into a bunch of way more restrictive clauses as to what you can or can’t do. So long as Randy’s the champion, they’ve got him in a full nelson tighter than the one Rich Clementi threw on Melvin Guillard.

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