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A significant portion of our readers are also fans of “The Low Blow”, our flagship radio show. And if you are a fan, you may have heard that this weekend, we’ll be doing a live show on Saturday, via streaming. Considering both of us are borderline retarded when it comes to technology, this thing will either be the most awesome show in the history of MMA, or it’ll tap out faster than Bo Cantrell (too soon?). Either way, every single reader absolutely needs to tune in and listen, since we’ll be doing the show right after UFC 78!

So, since we’re busy setting up everything to be hunky dory, we want everyone who listens to the show to start hyping it up. That’s right: your solemn duty is to lie, exaggerate, and do everything possible to get everyone to listen in. Tell your girlfriend that Oprah will be on, or your non MMA friends that hot, sexy naked women will be fucking on the show, live. Hey, it worked for Howard Stern, no?

So now you know what to do. What the fuck are you sitting there just reading this then? Get to it Jackals!

I know we said we’d take a break on the 2 girls 1 cup thing … but Joe Rogan is related to MMA. So here’s the deal: no more 2 girls 1 cup videos unless it involves major league MMA peeps. Okay? Okay.

Haha, fucking wicked:

UFC returns to New Jersey — a place the promotion hasn’t been for over two years — this Saturday for UFC 78. It’s fitting that the event is being held in Newark, just off I-95, because it could easily be called “UFC 78: E-ZPass.”

UFC 78 features no title fights, no grudge matches, and no transcendental marquee names. Instead MMA fans are presented with what amounts to a night of undercard fights and will have to wait six more weeks for UFC 79 — a monster event that does have fans buzzing.

Fightlinker is proud to announce the formation of the MMA world’s second-ever sanctioning body, setting the stage for us to make lots of money off other people’s work!

“Assholes Making Money off Mixed Martial Arts”, or AMMOMMA, will do absolutely nothing that isn’t already done by athletic commissions, and in many cases we will actually do less! We will establish a set of unified rules based on the Unified Rules, ensure fighter safety by following the same standards already in place, and ‘sanction world championship bouts’. And by sanction, I mean sell the rights to the highest bidder.

AMMOMMA has strong ties to the fight industry, led by the highly respected Fightlinker staff and the rotting corpse of Ravishing Rick Rude. With these connections, AMMOMMA will create THE ULTIMATE TOP TEN LIST by doing an unprecedented poll on both the Underground AND Sherdog forums to see who is really #1 around the world. Well known Sherdog user “GraciezNuts” will be our lead forum pollster.

Remember to show up at our press conference next Wednesday which will feature a FREE STEAK DINNER and some fat boxing guys!

Dana White sounded sick when he talked to Steve Cofield today about the current Randy situation. Or perhaps he was just wearing nose plugs … he is after all in New Jersey. Anyways, some interesting things were said but here’s the kicker:

“We’re gonna meet next Tuesday and have dinner. I gotta know what the end game is … if he’s going somewhere else … did someone like Cuban or one of the other goofballs offer him some obscene amount of money? And I don’t think anyone’s offered him offers to fight because he’s under contract to fight for me. But he could retire and go work for somebody else. Is that the end game? That’s the only end game that makes sense to me?”

There’s already been rumors swirling around that Mark Cuban has poached Randy for a management position with HDNet. As Dana said, this is definitely the most likely scenario. Sure, I’d love Randy to come back and say “OMG Dana I luv u lets get it on!”, it’s not fucking likely.

The problem with dumb rich fucks getting involved in the sport of MMA is they take guys like Randy and Fedor and just buy em out and stuff em into positions where no one gets to see them do what we want to see them do. Do I wanna see Randy Couture in a suit trying to sell me shitty HDNet cards? Am I interested in seeing Fedor fight Pedro Rizzo? Fuck no.

But these rich fuckers don’t have to play by the rules other fiscally responsible companies do. They’re free to do stupid things for no other reason than it strokes their ego to do it. If Mark Cuban is planning on growing slowly as he’s said many times before, does that mean we have to watch Randy Couture spend the last few competitive years of his MMA life hawking amateur Texas MMA? Goddamn it that would suck some gigantic testicles.

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