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As expected, Cuban ex-pat and judoka extrordinaire Hector Lombard has been taken off the UFC78 card because he was born in the wrong country. Whether it’s killing terrorists or fucking over communists, America totally rules. It’s hard to sleep at night here in Canada knowing that dirty Cubans are allowed into this country. So anyways, to deal with this latest ass-fucking by God, the UFC is shuffling around the UFC78 card a little bit, putting Ryo Chonan against Karo Parisyan instead of against Thiago Alves.

This really sucks for Karo, in my opinion. Parisyan vs Lombard worked because it was gonna be entertaining to watch two Judo masters shoot eachother across the octagon like slingshots. Lombard didn’t stand much of a chance overall, so I didn’t have to worry about Parisyan losing and pushing a potential title shot back to 2010 or beyond.

Now though, the UFC has put him up against a very dangerous but generally unknown fighter in Ryo Chonan. Yeah, Jordan Breen might be able to walk you play by play through all his DEEP bouts, but any UFC ‘fan’ dumb enough to buy the 78 PPV (“Ohh TUF winners fighting, how compelling”) aren’t gonna know who this dude is.

For the education of the dumb people who come to this site (ted, please pay extra attention), here’s some things you should know about Ryo Chonan:

  • Defeated Anderson Silva in 2004 using a Flying Scissor Heel Hook. If you think that sounds awesome, it is. I’d link to a youtube video of it, but those fuckers at Zuffa took it down.
  • Actually finishes fights. Well, sorta. Since 2004 he’s had 13 fights, with 6 of them going to decisions. That’s better than a lot of other snoozers the UFC imports from Japan.
  • In addition to beating Silva, Ryo has wins over Mach Sakurai, Joey Villasenor, Carlos Newton, Antonio Schembri, and Mr Choke Roan Carneiro. Villasenor stomped Ryo’s face in and smashed his orbital bone but still couldn’t finish him.

Translation: Ryo is one tough motherfucker.

So what’s so terrible about this switch up? Well, I don’t think Karo Parisyan should be challenged like this right now. I’ve already said that Karo should get first crack at the winner of Hughes/Serra. All man-love to GSP aside, that frenchy’s already gotten two title shots and Karo’s still waiting for his first. Being a ‘warrior’ and ‘accepting all challenges’ is all fine and dandy, but Karo needs an agent that keeps him from accepting dumb last second fights like this that don’t accomplish anything for his career.

If some news came out that Karo would get a title shot for beating Ryo, then I’d be all for it. But as it stands, that’s not gonna happen. So this fight is nothing but a very dangerous opportunity for Karo to once again get sent to the back of the line again.

While Chonan vs Parisyan is much more competitive than Parisyan vs Lombard, Joe Six Pack ain’t gonna give a shit if Karo beats Chonan. The flipside of that coin of course is that losing would be a pretty big blow to his popularity. That’s always the problem with bringing these foreigners in and dropping them in the deep end … you can seriously fuck up your existing star power because fans don’t realize what a tough SOB Chonan really is.

That tall skinny dude from TUF5 is making some awesome career decisions. First he turned down a chance to be a part of Matt Hughes’ gay-sounding H.I.T. Squad, and now he’s popped up in a tiny show out in Iowa that was promoted by Amsterdam Strip Clubs this weekend. Corey won the fight against some random guy in the first round via ground n pound.

Now at first I was wondering: WTF is up with Corey not being in the UFC? But then I got to thinkin’ … Hill ‘snuck’ onto the show with only one real MMA fight to his name. Going into the UFC with this kinda experience and getting dismantled is not the best way to start a career. So in that way, all the power to Corey for sharpening his skills and earning a spot in the big show.

But why the fuck is he fighting in shady strip club shows? I’d be amazed if he got paid more than 500 bucks for the fight. Someone get this guy Ken Pavia’s number. Ken will line him up with a dozen fights against suitable fodder and have him making more cheddar than most of the TUF guys are making in the UFC.

Last week we spent a bit of time making some promo clips for our radio show. Just in case you can’t stand the Low Blow, we’ve decided to make them available here for you!

Fightlinker Commercial – Unleash A Monster
If you’ve ever listened to FighOpinion Radio, you’ll love this one

Fightlinker Movie Preview – Hard to Knock Down
This is a tribute to every shitty mixed martial arts in the works right now

Evan Tanner’s abandoned boat has become something of a tourist attraction to the folks over at the Underground forum. If I wasn’t two day’s worth of driving away, I’d probably go check it out myself. I wouldn’t be happy with pictures though … I would get all up in there and search for anything Evan left behind … a shirt … a sock. Then I would rub it all over my body and be like “Oh shit yeah. Washed up fighter stank.”

There’s a lot more pictures after the jump

When Gary Shaw came into the MMA world, many people were worried that he was a crooked sideshow carny who would suck the life out of MMA. But like any successful parasite knows, you want to slowly bleed your host over time rather than kill them outright. So while EliteXC is looking pretty good right now, I still don’t completely trust Gary Shaw. There have just been too many warning signs.

One of the main issues I have with EliteXC is they seem to snap up every bad news fighter out there. They bailed Charles ‘Krazy Horse’ Bennett out of jail to try and get him to one of their events. And now they’ve re-signed Nick Diaz and signed Kimbo Slice to their roster.

Diaz of course is best known for trouncing Takanori Gomi while high out of his tree. He’s possibly one of the biggest stoners in the MMA world, and thats saying quite a bit considering how bong-happy most jiu-jitsu guys are.

Kimbo Slice is what’s known as a felony fighter … that means he fights guys in parking lots and back alleys for money. Sure he’s gone straight now and sure he looks like the spawn of Shaft and a gorilla … it doesn’t change the fact that he’s famous for illegal brawling.

I can’t pretend all of these guys are evil or don’t deserve to be allowed to fight. God knows I’ve probably smoked a few pounds worth of Mary Jane over the years, and I ran a fight club out of the basement of a club for a few years. Fuck, I’ve even done most of the things Krazy Horse is in trouble for … the only difference is I’m much better at getting away with it. But the fact that EliteXC seems to be booking all the bad news fighters out there sets off warning flags for me.

I’m still shocked that EliteXC didn’t lock up Babalu Sobral the second Dana White sacrificed him to the press gods. My bet is they were waiting for the furor to die down a little bit before getting in there. It’s too bad other less scrupulous promotions got to him before then. Those contracts aren’t exclusive though, so it wouldn’t surprise me if Babalu showed up in Shaw’s promotion down the road.

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