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Holy shit. If I ever needed proof that there was a god, I have it now. Through his divine power, we now have a face off between the two creepiest looking dudes in the UFC today: Luke Cummo and Edilberto Crocota. Those of you who have been with us since day one might remember Luke Cummo as the winner of the first annual “UFC Fighter who looks the most like a child molestor” contest. He was looking really good for a repeat until Crocota came out of nowhere and chilled my heart during the prelims of UFC70.

So now we will finally find out what makes you tougher: drinking your own urine or murdering prostitutes in Rio de la Hacha.

Here’s a Jerome LeBanner movie called Scorpion. The preview is actually put together pretty well, but according to one guy on IMDB, the fighting is “worse than Power Rangers”. Hey, maybe they should get Jerome to actually fight a power ranger then! Special thanks goes to maafaka for doin my job for me!

All day today I’ll be posting clips and previews from MMA-related movies. This first one comes care of UFC Countdown, who found this terrible Gary Busey flick “Beyond the Ring” about a dude fighting in a mixed martial arts tournament to pay his daughter’s medical bills.

Perhaps it’s because I’m Canadian, but I just don’t get that. Wouldn’t it be easier to just smuggle the bitch north of the border for treatment? Anyways, if you wanna know more about why America’s health care system sucks you can go watch Sicko. If you want to see some terrible acting and ham fighting, check this out.

I try to stay off the Bodog sites, since I know they’re just using MMA to try and suck me into gambling with them. And the last time I did that a big guy named Vargos showed up at my house to collect. That’s the last time I bet on Frank Mir! Anyways, they have a pretty decent interview with Matt Lindland, who they’ve swindled into signing some kind of long term deal. Perhaps he bet on Frank Mir too? In the interview they go over all the standard bullshit hype for his upcoming Bodogfight against some guy, but there’s also an interesting bit about getting booted from the UFC:

BN: Matt Lindland vs. Rich Franklin. What do you think?

ML: I would beat Rich Franklin pretty bad. My style matches up very poorly for Rich. He wouldn’t know what to do with the kind of fighter I am.

BN: Do you think that’s why the UFC released you from your contract?

ML: Why do I think they released me? I think they were trying to push Rich Franklin. I think that was pretty apparent. I asked for a Ken Shamrock or a Royce Gracie fight, and he was built up. It’s an old pro-wrestling move. It’s called getting him over. That’s what the UFC did with Rich. They got him over by giving him Ken Shamrock and feeding him some other cans and all of a sudden he’s the champ.

BN: Are you pissed off about that?
ML: Why would you want fight to stay in an organization that wants to release you? What you want to do is go and fight for somebody like Bodog Fight who wants you and appreciates you and gives you great opportunities to fight the best guys in the world, and that’s what I did. I’m making more money now, I’m happier, I have an organization that appreciates me and puts me on main cards and makes me a main event.

I wonder how many times we’re going to hear that last sentiment from other fighters down the road. I love the UFC and all, but they don’t always seem like the most pleasant people to work for.

So I’ve already bitched the UFC out for sugar coating Roger Huerta’s ride to the top while pitting Clay Guida against a who’s who of lightweight powerhouses. For the life of me I didn’t understand why the hell the UFC continued to feed Clay to the wolves bout after bout. Well, it turns out it’s because they … like him? From an article on InsideFighting:

The UFC leadership also gave lots of words of encouragement to him, according to Guida.

“They came up to me personally and said they thought I got hosed. Joe Silva said ‘We don’t care, you can lose ten fights like that and we’ll keep you.’ They said. ‘We had you winning.'” says Guida.

“[UFC co-owner] Lorenzo Fertita invite me to Vegas to workout with him and he said I was the most exciting fighter on the card and possibly in the UFC right now. That’s a pretty bold statement and it was definitely very complimentary.”

Joe Silva is such a snakeoil salesman. I’m sure he’s saying they’ll keep Guida forever, but one lackluster fight and they’ll likely toss him out just like they did with Nick Diaz. The reality of the situation is all these wins give you a reputation as a fighter who just can’t win the big fights. Just ask Joe Riggs how that’s worked out for him so far. Plus, words are nice but a man’s gotta get paid! UFC contracts usually pay double for a win, and Clay’s been robbed twice now. Here’s where you gotta cross your fingers and hope Dana White is really throwing some money around under the table.

Anyways, statements like the one above make me more hopeful that Clay’s fight will be shown at UFC74. That’s right … the fight may be the swing match or might not be shown at all. Boo-urns.

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