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It seems like not a month goes by without Brandon Vera saying he’s gonna be back in action ‘soon’. I was getting worried because July was almost over and the only Vera sighting has been on that reality show Fight Girls. Hey, I don’t blame him … with the way the UFC’s HW division has been stacking up lately, I’d be hiding with the women too.

Anyways, Vera has finally popped back up spouting the same message he was saying last month and the month before and the month before. Fortunately for his fan, I think this time things might actually move forward. Not only has an actual arbitration date been set, but there’s some relatively solid rumor-mongering going over at UFCMania that the UFC is prepped to stick Vera in the octagon with erstewhile contender Andrei Arlovski. Yippy skippy. I love it when two guys I don’t like face off in the octagon … you’re pretty much guaranteed to see one of them get their asses kicked.

Continuing the trend of big companies releasing substandard garbage, we’ve got Cage Rage with perhaps the ugliest piece of promotional shit I’ve ever seen. And that says a lot. I know everyone has a cracked copy of Photoshop on their computer nowadays, but how the hell did this get past quality control? I imagine the scenario going something like this:

“Hey check out this very cool poster I made for the next event, isn’t this like totally awesome?”

“Wow, it looks like totally kicking asses. This is like totally the most cutting edge design I’ve ever seen in my total life! I love the urine yellow background. It’s major dope.”

“Do you like the phat hip-hopper writing? I got it off of! Respect.”

“No way, I do not believe it. It is looks way too much professional to be free.”

“Yes way dude. Now lets go ass fuck each other!”

“It’s your turn to pitch.”

Hey everyone, it’s oldschool sensation Pat Smith! Pat is one of the original UFC guys, fighting in UFC 1, 2, and 6 plus a ton of Japanese promotions. After nearly 7 years off the circuit, Pat has returned. He was actually in Montreal fighting about a month ago, but I fucked up and went to the venue on the wrong day and ended up seeing a fucking Eagles cover band. What a waste of 40 bucks that was.

Anyways, I don’t advise watching too much of the video because Pat Smith’s girlfriend may turn you to stone or some shit. To save you the trouble, here’s some of the key nuggets of wisdom from Mr Smith:

  • Pat was the original Headhunter and challenged Paul Buentello for the name. Paul apparently pussied out
  • He destroyed one of Randy Couture’s “top guys”
  • He challenged Tim Sylvia, Wanderlei Silva, and Bob Sapp but no one would step up
  • The fights are ‘way much more dangerouser’ in Europe and Japan than America
  • Foreign tournament fighters are ‘stronger brain-thinking persons about themselves’ than their American counterparts.
  • Joe Silva wants Pat Smith back in the UFC to fight Frank Mir

If you’re mainly a UFC kinda guy, you may not know who Paul “Semtex” Daley is. Well just so you know, Paul is the current Cage Rage welterweight champion. His Muay Thai strikes are so effective his nickname refers to a plastic explosive used mainly by terrorists. There’s talk of Daley facing off with Nick Diaz down the road, which is pretty much the only interesting matchup EliteXC can pull off past setting up a ” target=”_blank”>Saw-like scenario between Diaz and Jake Shields. But this post isn’t about Nick Diaz or Jake Shields. It’s not even really about Paul Daley. This post is about Paul Daley’s girlfriend, who is fucking hot. Click the more button to see several pictures.

Special thanks to the Underground Forums for bringing these pics to light. However, you should all thank me for lifting these photos out of the southern-fried retard debate about black guys dating white chicks. Practically every post on there makes me drop IQ points … I’m amazed I’m actually able to string together coherent sentences after reading half that shit.

Hey, don’t believe me. Check out his latest cryptic blog.

I remember working in Bermuda. I remember riding down a muddy road, across open fields to a house. It was a small house that sat amidst the green, on a hill overlooking the the azure blue water of a cradling sea. Beside the porch, in the flower garden, there was a sign. “Live well, Laugh often, and Love much.” All I could do is stand, and look around at the beauty of the place and think “They know something that I am still trying to learn?”

Man, this is the kind of shit they find next to your rotting corpse on a crumpled peice of graph paper. I’ve always had a soft spot for Evan and his goofy hippy antics, but I’m starting to get a little bit concerned here!

Of course, the biggest concern for the rest of you jackals is “When is Evan Tanner coming back to the UFC???” Some people in the forums are thinking he may show up as soon as UFC 76. I doubt it though … the guy seems to be a pretty big shutter bug but the only MMA related pics in his unsecured photos directory (with somewhere near 500+ photos) were some shots from the nosebleeds at K1 Dynamite.

Bonus Read: The Adventures of Evan Tanner – Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Bonus Comic!!!

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