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Once again, the IFL has managed to take a good idea and fuck it up. Last week they announced they would air the IFL Grand Prix live on MyNetworkTV. That’s a good idea. But then everyone realized they’re only showing an hour of it live … 3 fights if we’re lucky.

Regardless, the idea of a Grand Prix is still pretty sweet … take the best fighters in the league and make them fight eachother. What a novel idea huh? Hell, it kinda sounds like what every successful MMA organization does for ALL their shows (excluding UFC 78)! But now the IFL is fucking that up by dropping two of their best fighters from the Grand Prix because they don’t want a champion who’ll fuck off next year to another group.

This is a perfect case of what works for the goose not always working for the gander. Whatever the fuck that means. But yeah … what works for the UFC – keeping guys from fighting for a belt without being locked into long term contracts – isn’t really viable for the IFL. Why? Because the IFL is second-tier. I’m not gonna go so far as to call them minor league, but they’re definitely nowhere close to the UFC, ProElite, HERO’s … ya know, the big boys.

So acting like they’re top tier is just another example of the IFL living in a state of delusion, and really makes me doubt their business plans even more than before. The best the IFL should be hoping for now is that their Grand Prix finalists will all move up to fight in the UFC. That would at least give the company some sort of validity as a legitimate feeder organization for the fighters who are in it. You can’t expect the best fighters in your company to stick around when your company isn’t #1. That’s like expecting a top prospect to keep playing for their college football team when an NFL team is calling with a multi-million dollar offer.

This is just the first of many tough-guy moves by the IFL that we’ll be seeing in the next few months. They’re probably reasoning that they’re being too nice and that’s why they’re losing money. The truth of the matter though is they’re losing money because they over-extended themselves before bothering to make the company profitable. They can’t downsize because they’re stuck having to create two hours of TV content a week. And the irony is these TV deals aren’t even covering the costs of making that content!

Anyways, all in all the IFL is fucked. Or maybe not. Remind me later this week to make a post on how to change the IFL so it would stop losing money. Not like they’re gonna do it. Stupid bastards.

Pro Wrestling is uber-lame nowadays. Sure we all watched it when we were stupid kids, and it was even somewhat okay to pay attention back during that whole Degeneration X era a few years back. But now it’s just embarrassing, and self-respecting adults should leave that habit behind with other childish habits like masturbating in socks (pity your mom for having to do your cum stained laundry) and doing whippits behind the gas station on Sunday afternoons.

That being said, I have no idea why talented guys like Dave Meltzer and Zach Arnold continue to cover that abortion of a ‘sport’. The day mixed martial arts slides into the same state pro wrestling is in is the day I hop onto the next hot bandwagon sport and blog about that instead. And while I don’t look forward to writing about competitive eating 4 to 7 times a day, it’s a small price to pay to be able to look at myself in the little mirror every morning while doing lines of meth and blow.

Fuck, this is a rambling post, isn’t it? The point of this whole rant is that Wrestling Observer’s Dave Meltzer is jumping ship from Fox Sports and has joined Team Cock Suck over at Yahoo Sports. I’ve never had a problem with Dave’s writing mainly because most of it is tucked away in a for-pay pro wrestling newsletter I don’t read, and I hear he tends to be factually correct most of the time. If he has a bias one way or another, it doesn’t come through when half the MMA websites out there rip off his shit and repost it on their site. So here’s hoping this is a step up for Yahoo and maybe they’ll boot Kevin Iole back to boxing where he belongs and let Meltzer run the MMA show.

In what I can only assume is an attempt to keep another New Jersey card from occurring, the UFC is spreading the talent that was once piled up on their New Years Eve show across other events.

So far, fighters who were originally marked to be on the card like Roger Huerta and Josh Koscheck have been moved to the TUF6 finale and some other event in 2008 respectively. Now it looks like the BJ Penn vs Whoever fight for the lightweight belt may also be pushed back to a 2008 event.

Hey, it makes sense: you’ve got Hughes vs Serra for the welterweight belt and now the possibility of Silva vs Liddell as well. That’s enough name power right there to float a big Las Vegas show. I doubt it’ll do the mega-business that Chuck vs Tito 2 did, but the UFC apparently isn’t interested in admitting Tito is still a marquee fighter that people love to see. Yes, more than Matt Hughes. More than Rich Franklin. Fuck, even more than Chuck Liddell. And y’all can hate on me for hugging Tito’s nuts, but the truth is I’ll call him a middle-class fighter any day but his draw is still unparalleled.

The UFC seems to be giving Marcus Aurelio a chance to shine by putting him up against an opponent so obscure he doesn’t even have a single picture on Sherdog. Luke Caudillo’s greatest achievement was … um … losing to Nate Mohr at Ultimate Fight Night 10. Past that he’s got a shitty 12-8 record, with almost all of his wins coming against guys with under .500 records.

I gotta find out who Caudillo’s agent is … if he can make it into the UFC maybe I can too. We’re probably about the same skill level and goddamn if I ain’t more marketable with my pretty boy good looks and sweet talk. The ladies would go nuts for me, I tells you.

Is this really the best fight the UFC can sort out for Aurelio? This guy was once considered the king without a crown of the PRIDE lightweight division. Now he’s been reduced to fighting a scrub in the dark matches of the UFC. PRIDE curse? Never heard of it.

Normally I wouldn’t waste my time writing about a fight between cockface Rich Clementi and a textbook TUF washout like Melvin Guillard, but there’s a couple of interesting tidbits of information surrounding this one. Way back at the beginning of the year, these two losers had a run in with eachtother that ended up with Guillard sucker punching Clementi. Not content to leave the altercation with just a cheap shot under his belt, Melvin then threatened to beat Rich ‘with my pistol’. Oh the crazy hijinx that Melvin Guillard gets up to.

This isn’t the first case of Melvin being a moron. He also accused Joe Stevenson of being on human growth hormones, then lost to Joe in 30 seconds, then tested positive for cocaine after the fight. This guy is officially up there in my list of dumb fighters who’ll be found face down in a ditch one day.

As much as I don’t like Clementi, he’s got this fight in the bag already. The two used to spar together and have had numerous run ins during kickboxing and grappling tournaments. Word on the street is Clementi p0wn3d Guillard on a regular basis during that time. So unless Melvin has learned something other than the half-life of recreational stimulants since last year, he’s gonna go down hard.

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