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As Joe Rogan once said, this man is my hero. If MMA were World of Warcraft, this guy would be our Leeroy Jenkins. But who is the sophisticated individual behind this display of UFC love? What goes on in the brain behind all that neon green paint? Well, that answer (like most answers in MMA) comes courtesy of Jordan Breen, who officially knows too much about everything except the touch of a woman.

The guy above’s name is James Ladner, and you can all rest easy about mocking him because he’s in jail and can’t hurt you. At least until 2013, anyways. The charge? Receiving stolen property … farm equipment to be specific. Who knew getting caught chucking corn with a stolen corn chucker gets you eight years in federal pound-me-in-the-ass prison? I guess the term ‘Just Bleed’ takes on a whole new meaning now.

Hold onto your panties, people. Dave Meltzer has revealed the awesome twist for this season’s TUF, and let me tell you what … it rivals anything M Night Shamalayan has ever done. Get this:

Specifically, the coach of the winning team will not pick the match up for the next bout. Instead, the coaches will alternate each week — regardless of a win or loss — when it comes to selecting the fights. The coach whose team has accrued the most wins throughout the six-week process will earn the right to coordinate both semifinal match ups.

Oh wow. That totally earned TUF a spot back on my Tivo. Not. What a revolutionary change that’s sure to change the entire feel of the series. Not. My hat is off to UFC brass for thinking completely outside the box and electrifying their stagnant series. Not.

For those of you who haven’t been around very long, let me point you to two articles I wrote on what TUF really needs to do to win me back. Unfortunately for me, I still have to watch this stagnant piece of shit in order to do commentary … the price I pay to provide you all with your daily dose of pissed off commentary. I swear to God there are lifeforms that evolve faster than this show.

Yeah we did another show yesterday. The talkshoe applet on the sidebar didn’t update earlier, but it’s all good in the hood now. So check this shit out! You can stream it and all that junk. I love technology.

I was looking over the conference call info for September 15th’s EliteXC show, and it got me thinking about their women’s division. First off I want to say hats off to EliteXC for bringing women’s MMA into the big leagues. With their marketing of Gina Carano they’ve managed to create a certain amount of legitimacy for fighting females. But now I gotta say this: if EliteXC is serious about promoting more than just Gina, they better get off their fucking asses and start booking more female fights.

So far the only bouts EliteXC has set up with women have all been for Gina. And they’re not just featuring Gina, they’re tailor made for her. Hey, I’ve got no issue with EliteXC developing their stars, but over the interests of developing a division? There’s tons of women out there who could literally rip Gina’s head off and shit down her throat. That alone would be worth the price of a PPV.

But fine … EliteXC wants to cultivate Gina’s talent so she moves past her ‘poster-girl’ status. They want her to develop into a true force in women’s MMA. Fine. I get it. I’m not demanding Gary Shaw sacrifices her to Amanda Buckner … but I do think it’s a shame that women like Buckner are stuck fighting in local shows and fucking Bodog. There’s no reason why Shaw shouldn’t be developing the women’s division in between Carano’s sparse appearances. Female MMA is one of the niches that the UFC has left open for EliteXC to exploit. And they should be milking it for all it’s worth.

So please … for all you ‘real media’ guys who are gonna be on this call: Can you please ask Gary why EliteXC has a Gina Division instead of a Women’s Division?

Oh puns, what would I do without you? For all the chit chat surrounding UFC75, the elephant in the room that no respectable blogger is willing to discuss is the possibility of Fedor signing with the UFC. Fortunately for my readers, I am not very respectable at all … nay, I am a rogue! A scoundrel! An agent of assumption and a reseller of rumors. And now I lay it on the line and say dispite what many people with better connections have said, I’m predicting Fedor signing with the UFC and the deal being done in the next two weeks. Why? Because I’ve got a serious fucking case of deja-vu.

We all remember what happened with Mirko Crocop? That was another deal shrouded in secrecy, with both parties flatly denying on record that things were set until UFC 67 ads showed up with CroCop kicking people’s heads in left and right. However, there were a few slip-ups … Crocop’s name started popping up in UFC programming. Training partners on Mirko’s web forum kept implying there was about to be a big announcement. And then there was that thing where Mirko’s picture got taken wearing a UFC hoodie. Oops.

And now again, lets look at what’s happening with Fedor: his name pops up in the Countdown to UFC75 show – and you know Dana never gives anyone outside his organization free advertising. Sources from the UFC side continue to say no (just like with Mirko) but over on the Russian side there are enough leaks to sink a Russian battleship implying that the deal is pretty much done. And of course, let’s not discount Fedor’s new Affliction shirt deal.

“Oh who fucking cares, it’s a t-shirt deal.” Yeah, a deal with the official provider of shitty t-shirts for UFC fighters. Dana White looked like a total goof through several seasons of TUF wearing their shit, and people want to act like there’s no way the UFC was involved in the sponsorship deal. Hell, the UFC never hooks it’s fighters up with sponsorships … oh wait, yes they do. They do that all the time.

Anyways, you all can take the facts as you will. I’m not guaranteeing that there’ll be an announcement of some sort at UFC75 … in fact, it wouldn’t surprise me if things are left purposely ambiguous to stir more hype and drive forum junkies nuts with the ‘will he / won’t he’ suspense. But mark my words … it’s pretty much a done deal at this point.

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