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This week’s Low Blow is out for your listening pleasure. Don’t be a little bitch. Reading is for fucking nerds. Real men listen to their news. You are a real man, aren’t you?

Okay, so I promise this is the last Dynamite related posting unless Sakuraba’s head explodes when a doctor taps his knee with one of those little rubber hammers.

After the UFC bought Pride, K1 was by far the biggest competition they had left. This Dynamite show was supposed to be the beginning of K1’s North American push and if it had been done right it would have meant the UFC had a serious contender on it’s hands. While not exactly popular in America, K1 is still a recognizable brand and they have an existing global framework. In Japan all signs were pointing to an all out war between K1 and the new PRIDE, with K1 talking trash and pushing the foreign devil angle hard.

What a difference one show can make. When K1 booked a stadium for their show, I thought they had just shot themselves in the foot. Now it’s becoming apparent that they may have shot themselves directly in the face. The CSAC sanctioning body are a bunch of pricks that you don’t want to jerk around, and it seems like this is exactly what K1 is doing. So far the commission has put on a reasonable face to the public, but don’t think for a second they’re happy with all the incompetance. If the CSAC wasn’t getting a cut of the gate money, they’d have told K1 to go fuck themselves sometime last week.

Whoever’s in charge of things for K1 needs to be fired, immediately. K1 needs to ante up and pay someone who knows what they’re doing to come in and clean up this mess. Obviously Dana White’s not about to help out, but there’s already the Strikeforce connection through Gary Shaw (who himself must have some connections in the CSAC) and Ed Fishman, who seems to fancy himself as a man who can solve problems.

Regardless of who it is, something has to be done. With no one effective at bat for K1, their fighters are already being refused licenses. The fact that Dynamite promoters claim they don’t even know why is either a testament to their impotence or idiocy in the matter. They should have a guy camped outside CSAC offices, supervising every moment fighters spend with the commission or their representatives.

The ramifications if this show tanks are huge. As ‘Mr Japan Scandal’ Zach Arnold mentions, this goes far beyond losing a pile of money: K1 has sold the television rights to this shit around the world. They probably could have had an empty stadium and still made money off all the TV money paid by stations in Japan, Korea, and elsewhere in the east. But if the show doesn’t happen or marquee fighters like Hong Man Choi or Sakuraba don’t compete, it could cause massive damage to K1’s relationship with these television stations. And I think we all remember what happened to PRIDE when they lost their TV deal.

It’s looking like the UFC might win this war with K1 without having to fire a single shot. And after K1, who else is there to compete with Zuffa’s growing empire of MMA? Sure, there are a number of middling promotions who are managing to put together interesting cards, but there’s currently no one with the necessary bankroll to give the UFC a real run for their money. In the years to come, people may look back at June 2nd as the day the UFC truly won the battle for control of mixed martial arts.


The ADCC site has an interview with Elvis Sinosic, who just can’t seem to get a break in the world. His record reads like a who’s who of MMA, with Sinosic having his ass kicked by more top tier talent than anyone else I’ve ever seen. Dispite his spotty record, Sinosic almost pulled an upset off against an overconfident Michael Bisping. How close did Elvis come to winning?

ADCC: Talk more about that kimura and what was going through your head and how tight it was?

ELVIS: I pretty much thought I had the fight won and it was over. The kimura was tight, his arm popped. He just didn’t give up. That’s a credit to him and his heart.

Personally, I like Elvis because his fights are never boring and he bleeds a lot. So here’s hoping we see him again soon in the Octagon.

Yesterday I was calling K1 a bunch of retards for trying to sign Ruediger onto their Dynamite show. Why anyone would want to board the Titantic after seeing the incoming iceberg, I don’t know. But common sense said that Ruediger would be stuck in his existing UFC contract or at least a no compete clause from the Ultimate Fighter contract. However, it looks like I am the retarded one. Hot fox Loretta Hunt has the following on the topic:

“The Ultimate Fighter 5″ contestant Gabe Ruediger has been released from his contract with Zuffa LLC. and has had his “administrative suspension” lifted, says Nevada State Athletic Commission Executive Director Keith Kizer, thus clearing the way for Ruediger to compete on June 2’s K-1 “Dynamite” card.

I have to admit that I’m pretty surprised. I had assumed Dana White was secretly happy with Gabe and all the drama he created for the show. There’s no doubt that Ruediger is the best known character on the show. While he did come across as a pussy, he was saved from being Pussy of the Season by Andy Wang, who continues to astound us all with his idiocy. Letting Gabe out of his contract is against the standard ‘Evil Corporation Manual’ the UFC follows, which states “Fighters who annoy or embarass the company should be locked in a dark basement for the rest of their contract, never to be heard from again.”

When it comes to cool chicks who fight, it doesn’t get much cooler than Roxanne Modafferi. Roxanne is like that girl who plays video games, loves surfing the internet, and is always down for a night of naked Star Trek. Except on top of all this, Roxanne is also an MMA fighter, which adds about 5000 cool points. If I was allowed to marry outside of my cult I would totally track her down and woo her.

Anyways, Roxanne keeps a blog of her adventures in Japan. It’s full of insightful fight-related thoughts that could only come from someone with a vagina:

On the day of the weigh-ins, I found myself face to face with my opponent, Shayna Baszler. Unable to produce any sort of evil glare without looking ridiculous, I settled for a thoughtful expression. I hate meeting my opponents before fighting. I fear I’d start to like them and my emotions will effect me when I’m trying to pound her face in. I couldn’t avoid talking to her without being rude, however, and we ended up promising to be enemies before, and make friends after the fights. Both avid fans of Dragon Ball Z, we posed DBZ style during the face-off. I left the weigh-ins forcing myself to mentally imagine kicking her face without feeling bad.

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