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Oh my fucking God:

UFC 76 took place at the Honda Center in Anaheim, Calif. on Saturday, Sept. 22, and featured Keith Jardine’s upset split-decision victory over Chuck Liddell. Jardine earned $14,000 for the victory, and Liddell earned $500,000 in defeat.

In case you were wondering, Liddell earned over 35 times the amount of money Keith Jardine made. Of course, Chuck Liddell is like the Michael Jordan (or Wilt Chamberlain) of the UFC so it makes sense that he gets payed that much. Plus under the table bonuses. Plus UFC-brokered sponsorship money. Plus Dana’s first born child.

On the other hand, Keith Jardine making 14k for his win is simply hilarious. Jardine was an Ultimate Fighter 2 contestant, and he got the same shitty contract the rest of the TUF losers got: 7000 to fight and 7000 to win. That was two years and 7 fights ago. Looking at his record you can balance his salary out at $42,000 a year. For you kiddies still in school, here’s a nice point of reference: Plumbers make $54,000 a year on the low end of the scale.

One would hope that Keith is gonna get a renegotiated contract sometime soon, but for some reason the UFC is weird about stuff like that. Rich Franklin has been stuck on a dog of a contract for years now while Houston Alexander apparently signed a new contract before his first UFC opponent even made it to the hospital. So who knows if Dana White will reward Jardine and up his pay or keep him where he is until the terms of his TUF serfdom expire.

Of course, my bitching could be completely moot. There’s always all this talk of magic money that flows freely under the table and away from the prying eyes of sanctioning bodies. But I don’t have faith in Jesus or God existing, so why should I put faith in the idea of mystical pay either? Until I see definitive proof that the average UFC fighter can afford a mortgage payment, fuck that shit.

Regardless of how dopey he looks with a mariachi mustache, there’s nothing dopey about the idea of a lightweight Diego Sanchez:

“Close isn’t close enough. I’m just going to have to go back to work and get stronger and come back,” said Sanchez. “I’m contemplating in my mind whether I’m going to drop to 55 (155 pounds) or not because I am really a smaller welterweight, but its either that or start powerlifting and get a little stronger because I felt not as strong in there as I should have been.”

In the past I’ve been critical about fighters who drop weight after hitting a few bumps in their current division. I won’t name any names, but I’m talking about Mike Swick. But now I’m starting to think that I’m not against changing weight classes, I’m against changing weight classes into the welterweight division. It’s so fucking stacked in there that it’s impossible to keep a streak going. It’s by far the best weight class in the UFC.

I’d say the lightweight division is probably third on the list, after the Light Heavyweight division. LHW is on the edge of exploding, they’ve got so many big names and star power. Lightweight is the opposite: they’ve got tons of guys with lots of skill, but not any marquee names they can rest the division on. That’s why with Sean Sherk out (soon), who the fuck are they gonna have fight BJ for the vacant belt?

That’ll change in the next year with guys like Spencer Fisher, Kenny Florian, Clay Guida, and Tyson Griffin coming into their own. But for now, a guy like Diego who was two wins away from a title shot at Welterweight could immediately step up to the plate and be ready to challenge for the lightweight belt before the snow melts in Canada this spring. Well, depending on how global warming affects things.

TAGG Radio is reporting that Frank Mir’s next opponent will be Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira. Which means that’s not really what’s going to happen. We’ve had a love hate relationship with the TAGG guys over the past few months … we love it when they report cutting edge news. But we don’t love it so much when it turns out they’re full of shit and completely wrong. So from now on whenever the source is TAGG Radio or any of the individuals involved in TAGG Radio, we will follow up by saying “this probably isn’t true”.

Man, staph infections are starting to scare the fuck out of me. I had a dream last night that I had staph on my cock, and the staph ate through my nut sack and my testicles fell out like a pair of bloody ben wa balls. Then we were at Ben & Jerry’s and one of the flavors was Josh Barnett’s Praline Wrestling Slam. I was like wow, Josh Barnett is the only MMA guy to have his own flavor of ice cream. But then I figured that guys like Luke Cummo probably made their own ice cream out of semen or something. That would never make it into Ben & Jerry’s though.

So where was I? Oh yeah … staph infections. Nick Diaz has one of those:

Nick Diaz has been hospitalized with a severe staph infection that he contacted a few days prior to his EliteXC fight. He was admitted to the hospital when he arrived in Las Vegas to watch his brother’s fight. He has been on an antibiotic IV since Tuesday and will probably remain so through the weekend.

Personally, I like it more when Dana White talks about staph … he explains staph in easy to understand terms like “the size of a golf ball” and “the size of a coffee cup” to tell us how severe it is. I dunno what anitobiotic IVs are but they sound like robots or some shit. I hope Nick Diaz isn’t being turned into like the robot or something like what happened to that fat chick in Superman 3. That would totally suck.

Shit, I think i got a contact high just from talking about Nick Diaz. He’s one potent motherfucker.

I’m often pretty harsh with the UFC for their abysmal pay rate for fighters. On one hand I don’t want pay to get out of hand like it has in boxing, but on the other hand I don’t think anyone fighting in the UFC should have to work a second job to break 30k a year after fighting expenses. Most people see the UFC raking in millions at the gates and 20+ millions through pay per view and they wonder where the fuck all that money is going. Well, not all of it is going into Zuffa’s pockets. A lot of it is being put back into promoting the sport and the UFC as a brand:

Billings for the account have been estimated in the $20 million range, contingent on the brand campaign launching–a significant upgrade from the $2.8 million UFC spent a year ago in measured media, according to TNS Media Intelligence.

That might seem like a lot of money at first, but I’ve got my doubts about those figures. ‘Measured media’ includes all television, radio and print ads. If the UFC managed to do what it did in 2006 on 2.8 million, that’s pretty fucking impressive. Even 20 million seems low when you consider the money they’ve spent on marketing just in the UK:

Fertitta said the company is spending $4.5 million to market the UFC brand in the U.K. alone. And that doesn’t include the $1.4 million the UFC spent to market Saturday’s event.

The UFC is also dropping some decent coin in Mexico, trying to chip away at the stranglehold boxing has on the region. There’s also retard talk about an event in Europe, and possibly even the wilderness of Canadia. No word yet on if that event will be held in a giant igloo or beaver dam.

Overall, I’d say it’s a pretty good decision to pour money into the sport … something boxing hasn’t done and is paying the price for now. People like to think mixed martial arts is here to stay, but I wouldn’t be so sure. If it goes down I’ll go back to being that creepy guy who blogs about Gilmore Girls. So I’m glad the UFC has the foresight to be putting a good chunk of the cash they’re making into locking the sport into the mainstream mind. Although how about paying these fighter guys a little bit more too, huh?

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