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Subo Says: The UFC 137 Wrap-Up

(pic via the very awesome UFC 137 photo gallery at

At the very, very least, I need to commit to giving my Jackal brethren (yep, you’re stuck with me again – deal with it) card wrap ups that they can bring up in 6 months to point out how wrong I was.  So, without much further ado… the first installment of Subo Says.

-Carlos Condit becomes the most recent fighter to see his title shot derailed by one Nick Diaz.  Nick’s previous shafting of a fighter expecting a bout for the belt was more direct; whilst holding Strikeforce’s trinket belt, Diaz skipped a pre-fight drug test ordered by the CSAC, killing Jay Hieron’s title shot (upon which his signing with Strikeforce was predicated) and receiving neither sanction nor punishment from neither promoter nor commission.  

This time, Diaz’s admittedly impressive performance (and post-fight non-brawling) was enough to set GSP (and, by extension, Dana White) into a tizzy, and Condit has now been informed to skip that whole waiting-for-your-title-shot thing.  I don’t like it one bit. Now, Carlos Condit probably fights Jon Fitch (who would beat Nick Diaz like a drum), while Diaz is rewarded for failing to fulfill his contractually obligated media appearances with… another title shot.  If I’m Jon Fitch, I’m starting I “don’t be scared homie” campaign yesterday.

-Cheick Kongo gets to keep his job as official UFC HW gatekeeper, and Meathead goes back to the drawing board.  I didn’t think rounds 1 and 2 were written in stone as Kongo rounds, but I can’t whine about the decision.  Hopefully we get to see Kongo annihilated by the Overeem-Lesnar loser.

The rest after the jump!
-My boy Cerrone feeds off of your hatred.  Disparaging his TapouT cowboy hat or his delusional ramblings about making 145 (Donald, I love you, but that’s never going to happen, buddy) is like spraying lighter fluid onto your ex-girlfriend’s possessions: it might make you feel good in the moment, but it’s not exactly extinguishing the fire, and you’ll never be able to get back those photos of her naked you accidentally destroyed.  Good call – now the immolated remains of pictures you took while she was sleeping are “in the mix”.

-If you had told Mirko Cro Cop or BJ Penn ten years ago that they’d retire on the same day in 2011, they’d probably say “man, I must have had one helluva career.”  And both did.  None of this “Cro Cop got exposed in the UFC” or “BJ Penn choked in every big fight” revisionist bullshit this time around.  The game just passed them by.  The top fighter in 2003 just ain’t gonna be the top fighter in 2011.  By the end of Barack Obama’s second term (slam dunk, to my nervous Canadian friends), we may have seven completely different champions.  That doesn’t mean today’s champs suck.

-Eliot Marshall deserved a draw, if not a win, in his bout against Brandon Vera.  The first was razor close (I gave it to Marshall) and the third was arguably a 10-8.

-Bartimus pulling back his right hand to give it extra juice before he KO’ed Tyson Griffin was really, really funny.  Go back and watch it again if you missed it.  Griffin is 1-3 in his last four and came in fat; I’d be nervous if I were him.

-Hatsu Hioki is still really, really good, you guys. I promise.

  • CAP

    Cerrone now booked to fight Nate Diaz seems like a step backward for him. But I will enjoy watching him stomp that lil thug bitch. No hurry I guess with the logjam at the top of LW.

  • Letibleu

  • Symbul

    What the fuck is this? Subo talking perfect sense?

    Man, that Zuffa buyout of Strikeforce must have really changed you.

  • mmariusp

    Who the fuck would pay to see GSP vs Fitch 2?
    Sure he has a fantastic record, but he has not evolved shit since their first fight and he did not beat BJ Penn like Nick Diaz did on saturday.

    I feel sorry for Condit but really, who the fuck cares?

    I think the weight jumping was the thing who killed BJ´s career, he is only 32 or 33 and he looked fukcing old against both Jon Fitch and Nick Diaz.

    And can someebody tell me why Brandon Vera still making 60 k+60k?

  • glassjawsh


    derek, wtf man? I thought we were facebook besties?

    nick diaz hasnt faced a wrestler since 2006. so how the fuck do you know how he’d do against a wrestler? that’d be like saying shogun could beat allistair overeem today because he fucked him up twice 5 years ago. and yes that’s an apt comparison because both diaz and overeem are vastly improved (and you illogically hate them both). Nick Diaz would do to fitch what he does to everyone. wear him out via activity and mean mugging.

    condit probably still got paid so who gives a shit that he got jerked around? jon fitch is already scheduled to fight jonny hendricks at 141. so here’s guessing the UFC gives Condit Anthony Johnson on the same card as the GSP-Diaz fight (both of which will end up being dope as fuck)

    donald cerrone is a good fighter. there is no denying it. that being said. who the FUCK has he beaten? if you weren’t trying to get wrist deep inside his sister (who IS cute) you wouldn’t give a crap about him. this year he’s beaten two guys with balls for ground game (Siver, Kelly) a 145er (Oliveira) and some dude who’s only win the UFC was against Cody goddamned mackenzie. Nate Diaz will fuck Cerrone up and (yet again) im willing to bet you a piss drink over it.

    I agree on Hioki though. time will show that he’s a legit top 5 featherweight

    and who the fuck is trite enough to burn their girl friends belongings? at least be original when you’re acting psychotic. I prefer the old “100 condoms filled with water, frozen and dumped dumped in her yard and porch” dickcicle routine.

  • Letibleu

    I would like to point out BJ had great take downs against Fitch. I would have to watch the fight again to see if it was BJ gassing or Diaz’ take down defense that kept BJ on his feet when he tried to take Diaz down. Maybe a bit of both.

  • iamphoenix

    does this mean richard is going away? PLLEEEAAASSEEE PRETTYY PLEEEAAASSSSEEE

  • thingvolds

    “Nate Diaz will fuck Cerrone up and (yet again) im willing to bet you a piss drink over it.”

    ttt for this bet

  • ghostboner

    Subo got it right on Diaz and Cerrone. I second the call for the piss bet. Do you remember how G. Sotiropopulopulous was being hyped to ridiculous levels, talking about he gets a title shot after he beats Siver? Well Siver embarassed him and Cerrone just owned Siver. Siver is underrated. I’m not trying to bang any of Cerrone’s relatives and the dude is one of my 2 favorite fighters. Nate is a tough fight for Cerrone but I think he takes it.

    And I would pay to see GSP vs Fitch 2. Or 3 or 4. Their first fight was awesome, and I love awesome fights. The only other tests for GSp at 170 are Condit and Kampmann. I don’t get all the hate on Fitch. Ok, I do get it, but let’s use logic. He did exactly what Nick Diaz did to BJ. He got beat in rd 1, started to put it together in rd 2, and pummled the shit outta him in rd 3, without finishing him. Title shot for Fitch immediately.

  • Cogzilla

    that chick in letibleus picture looks like her dick is coming out from under her dress

  • frickshun

    Least provocative thing Subotic has ever written.

    PS: Siver sucks worse than BJ’s cardio. When BJ goes back to 155, he’ll still beat everyone but Francis Edgar.

  • CAP

    No way Subo takes that bet.

    Rumble would be a sick opponent for Condit and makes sense. Add Silva/Sonnen and that card could be fucking epic. If BJ does stick around it should be at 155.

    And christ my knees would give out too if I had to haul that rack around.

  • Reverend Clint

    what kind of narsasistic cowboy feeds on burned pics of his own sister? or did I read that wrong?

  • Redping

    Cerrone will dispatch Nate fairly easily unless he makes the mistake of letting it go to the ground. I completely disagree about fitch beating diaz, as i’ve seen fitch get rocked by mike pierce. who you ask? yeah, I don’t know either. maybe in the broken boxing 10-9 rounds where the judges hate jiuijitsu and reward you for holding on and never posturing up. But Diaz would beat the shit out of fitch far worse than he did to BJ, wit ha lot less respect. From his guard or standing, fitch wouldn’t be a pretty man after it

    What I don’t get is – if Elliot Marshall didn’t get a 10-8 for the last round, why the fuck did fitch get it over BJ? BJ was tired as shit and Fitch literally didn’t even posture up once, just threw tiny pillow punches trying to cut the face or annoy him or something. BJ looked tired but a 10-8 is usually an ass-kicking or a near-submission/submission that the guy doesn’t tap and survives the round from. I mean he SUCCEEDED with the armbar, if there was a 4th or if it were real life, he would have won the fight. do you have to be a name to get a 10-8?

  • Jarman

    agreed subo. allofit. WTF you gotta do the gain a 10-8? it’s been established…..your opponent must perform 2 back somersalts from your punches in the same round… almost knock down, then breaking buddy’s arm is enough in my book, but I’m not a judge.

  • Fitdaws

    Surprisingly as it may sound there are many of us who disagree with your Obama slam dunk theory. ( Not to talk politic b.s on this site, but you had to throw that in there!}

  • frickshun

    ^^WTF is w/that awkward, ugly arm? I pray that isn’t yours….

  • ghostboner

    I think he just shopped the knee off that hot broad from leti’s post and put it where his arm would have been. And Redping I really hope we get to see Fitch vs Diaz after Diaz takes his “worst beating ever in the UFC” If Dana thought there was any chance Diaz could murder Fitch in the cage I’m pretty sure he would’ve had him do that before fighting for the title.

  • KeyboardWarrior

    fitdaws, where do you workout and how do I get my arms like that?

  • Letibleu

    if it was a bigger pic i know 2 people who would have a field day…

  • frickshun

    Here’s a pic of my Xarm: L

  • iamphoenix

    i’m pretty sure someone on here has jerked it to joans face. Out of disgust though. Like a hate jackoff session.

  • frickshun

    Since I’m a bit of a sci-fi nerd, I use this:

  • DJ ThunderElbows

    I’m a nerd too, but I’d never waddle my paddle to Yaddle.

  • P W

    At least Fitdaws got the memo to ensure his avatar is adequately gay. However, you probably shouldn’t use a pic of yourself unless your ok with people masturbating to it using a thermos filled with boiled pasta (I guess it’s you’re average jackal’s masturbation tool of choice, since they are too poor to use a Fleshlight, but too much into jerking off to simply use their hands).

  • CAP

    behold my fleshlightsaber!

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