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The Incredible Expanding UFC 136 Post

(image by Mista Peter O’Toole!)


Fan judging for the Kenny Florian vs Jose Aldo fight was all over the place, but FightMetric had Aldo winning all five rounds due to more significant strikes.

Both Joe Lauzon and Dana White agree: Melvin Guillard was looking past his fight on Saturday night:

“I was back in the hotel room taking it easy and relaxing because I knew I had to tend to business tonight,” he said after the show. “I definitely think he was overlooking the whole entire thing. He was looking past me. But I like being in that position. I hope everyone overlooks me like that.”

“He came dancing in there like he won, like he just won the fight, instead of being serious,” White said of Guillard’s pre-fight posturing. “It’s one of the things I always say about this – and I’m not taking anything away from Lauzon. Lauzon fought awesome. It would be one thing if we said, ‘It went to the ground and Lauzon submitted him.’ But he rocked him twice and then submitted him.

“That kid just doesn’t have the focus that he needs. [Guillard] has got all the talent and the skills.”

While Chael Sonnen seems pretty insistent on fighting Anderson Silva in Vegas for Super Bowl weekend, the UFC ain’t so sure. No one really mentioned this, but it must be in the back of people’s minds that Chael can’t fight in Nevada right now due to his unresolved commission issues in California. In fact, Texas may be one of the few commissions willing to license him, meaning the fight just may happen at Cowboys Stadium:

“We’ve been talking to (Cowboys owner) Jerry Jones for a while about doing a fight there,” White said. “It’s just got to be the right fight. We’re definitely going there. It’s just a matter of when.”

Could Dallas host the rematch?

“I think it could,” White said. “I think we could do a big, big venue for that one.”

A reporter from Brazil practically begged Dana White to hold the rematch in Brazil, but Dana must still have visions of riots in his mind: he said something about wanting Chael to make it out of the fight alive before moving on to other topics.

Did Keith Florian’s shreiking during his brother Kenny’s fight with Jose Aldo drive you bonkers for five rounds? You weren’t the only one. “Keith Florian” trended on twitter tonight, and surprisingly enough most people weren’t fans of his cornering style. Some samples:

 @BlondAmbitionTO: Keith Florian: Your grating tone and gutteral, frenzied screams are as welcoming as a yeast infection. Zip zip zip it. #ufc

 @MMAOUTSIDER Keith Florian is on the top of his game. His game is yelling useless advice

 @MikeGin140 Keith Florian is why I never feel too bad when Kenny loses a title fight.

 @BIAHTroyMachir Imagine the loudest most obnoxious Red Sox fan you can. Whatever that is, multiply by 10, and that’s Keith Florian for you

 @justinfauxmma Keith Florian almost went two rounds without me contemplating suicide at the sound of his voice, impressive.

 @OLDIRTYBEAR86 Deaf people can hear Keith Florian

We’ll talk about Frankie Edgar’s amazing finish in a second, but how about a moment to discuss the amazing butt on tonight’s guest Octagon Girl Vanessa Hanson. Thanks to the Reverend for the find.

Awards for this event were set at 75k a pop, with Nam Phan vs Leonard Garcia getting Fight of the Night (and confirming our suspicions that retarded slugfests > amazing fights every time). Submission of the Night went to Joe Lauzon (even though Chael’s arm triangle was slicker) and KO of the Night goes to none other than Frankie Edgar.

The scorecard for Frankie Edgar / Gray Maynard III heading into the fourth. Based on this, what is needed for a 10-8 round is at least two rolling backflips. (via MattRoth512)

Our homebitch Esther’s UFC 135 gallery is quickly filling up over at Above: Joe Lauzon, the goofiest badass on the planet.

In case you missed Chael Sonnen’s victory speech:

“Anderson Silva – you absolutely suck. Super Bowl weekend … the biggest rematch in the history of the sport. I’m calling you out, Silva, but we’re upping the stakes. I beat you, you leave the division. You beat me, I’ll leave the UFC forever.”

Heh, well played sir. Oh, if you were wondering if Chael was still taking testosterone leading up to this fight in Texas and if it could cause any problems, here’s how he answered that question before the event:

“I really can’t get into it because I don’t fully understand it myself. It’s one of those things you try to learn as best you go but I’m not the guy who handles that. I’m not a manager. And they don’t make it extremely clear. There’s not a web site or anything we can go to to find out. …It would be helpful if the commissions told us more. It makes it tough on a guy to follow a rule when nobody is willing to clarify what the rule is.”


The UFC 136 press conference is going as of 12:20AM EST. Above, the sad side of the podium table.

  • iamphoenix

    I made one for the other universe. apparently, Ryan Fightlinker doesn’t run Fightlinker on the other side. >>

    This chick better stay because her ass is awesome. I’m feeling a fight hotness tomorrow. PEOW PEOW

  • kvelertak
  • frickshun

    1) Right before the main event, I told my boss “Nelson & Cecil are the absolute worst”……so no surprise about how they scored it. 2) That chick’s ass looks great with a wedgie but flat as fuck in the PPV. 3) Phoenigga’s write-up is funny as fuck!!

  • fightlinker

    yeah she did a shite job of ring-girling. Who knew that was even possible?

  • Reverend Clint

    well she doesnt have 25 yrs of ring girl experience like arianny… at this point a retard is better than mandella.

    ps: dont listen to frick about the attractiveness of a girl

  • frickshun

    ^^Yeah, listen to the chubby guy who just scored his 1st girlfriend!! Thank gawd for poor vision, huh Clint?!

  • Reverend Clint

    frick how many pieces of art have you owned? would owning 1 piece preclude you from appreciating or know whats good?

  • FilmDrunk

    Chandela is beat, everyone knows it. And Chael looked way more cut than usual. Probably because he’s juicin– er, testosterone replacing his face off.

  • DJ ThunderElbows

    Chael’s pharmacist was on point last night.  Too bad he doesn’t have the balls to fight on his own.

    She has zero ass you dipshits.  Frick may know little more about women than how to hand them his balls in a velvet box, but he sure as fuck knows when he’s not seeing ass.

    Sticking her hips out and only having what’s in that pic while wearing booty shorts is a baby-microwaving travesty.  You motherfuckers are dumb as shit when it comes to booty.  Sorry for getting angry, but this is some serious shit.  You can be wrong about fighting all the time, but booty is important.

    Speaking of which, Frankie blew me away.  I admit it, even though I liked the guy, I previously thought he was the undisputed BJ-wanted-bigger-money-at-welterweight champion.  But tonight, he not only beat one of the biggest dudes in the division, he not only beat a guy who crushed him in both first rounds, he even did it with the same punch Gray rocked him with. Amazing.

  • theinsaneoneJustinMcCully

    I finally saw some of that Chael vs Spider 1 in HD. Chael had the worst case of body acne ever, juiced to the max.

  • DJ ThunderElbows

    In the glow of Frankie’s win and the darkness of people saying that twig has an ass, I almost forgot the other most satisfying win ever – J-Lau.  Little Jiu-Jitsu my ass.  I wanted to squat a dump out on his mother’s face while pointing at the screen and laughing my ass off.

    Great job, Creepy Joe.

  • frickshun

    Clint–0. Yes.

  • Reverend Clint

    ha reminds me of those guys who think the only way you can really know anything about MMA is to practice BJJ


    yeah PW seemed like Joe and goldberg were a commentary hit squad for kenny. But it wouldnt be the first time joe had a boner for a certain fighter, anytime a guy does crackhead control he lifts the table with out using his hands.

  • malonth

    The whole Joe/Kenny thing got on my nerves as well. I’m sure Kenny is a good buddy, but is that the reason? Sometimes Rogan will try to make fights seem close that are not close for obvious reasons of keeping the fans interested. It was a bit of a boring match, particularly with Kenny pushing Aldo into the fence for 75% of the match. But let’s admit, Couture has gotten “victories”, i.e. decisions doing just that against Brandon Vera and others.

  • P W

    Why were Rogain and Zoidberg brown nosing Kenny for fucking five rounds straight? It was all about Kenny is/should be doing this and that, and highlighting every single little thing he did, when in fact he was never even close to accomplishing anything. Was it an effort to compensate for giving him a title fight he didn’t actually deserve?

  • Symbul

    New ring girl is so vanilla it hurts.

  • Reverend Clint

    plenty of coffee n chocolate with the other two

  • Garp

    I think the ring girls all need to go the way of the gladiator guy at the beginning of the show. Brittney Palmer was the only hot one in the bunch and now she’s gone, gone, gone. (sniff)

  • Dove Strangler

    Great coverage guys, thanks for the random gifs and youtube videos going to look forward to the podcast about event this 3 weeks from now. Glad you have the money to be professionals now.

  • frickshun

    Fucking Dove is back?? FUCKING DOVE IS BACK!!

  • scissors61

    yeah PW seemed like Joe and goldberg were a commentary hit squad for kenny

    He did the same thing when Kenny fought BJ. “Kenny’s making BJ work!” Two minutes later…tap tap tap. In any case, pretty great card. I never thought this shameless BJ Penn fanboi would be saying it, but I’m a Frank Edgar fan now. Dude’s a fucking good fighter.

  • frickshun

    ^^You just figured that out, you cockface??

  • Reverend Clint

    he still sucks… just not against gay manhard

  • iamphoenix

    you mean Greg maynor

  • agentsmith

    I was more irritated at Rogan for making like Phan vs Garcia was the best fucking fight he’d ever seen, when all I saw was Garcia winging ridiculous power-punches like a cowboy in the saloon parking lot on Friday night.

  • scissors61

    ^^You just figured that out, you cockface??

    I already knew it, but I didn’t want to admit it.

  • Carcass

    Sad to agree with Dove Strangler.  This is your job guys…up your game.


    And Clint, because I do BJJ, I know more about why guys aren’t getting subs but that’s about it.  However, I’d always take the word of someone who trains over an armchair fat fuck any day.

  • Reverend Clint

    what if that fat fuck is a world class MMA fighter in his mind? He is fedor waiting to escape his whale like body? Oh wait.

  • CAP

    Glad Edgar finally finished this decisively so the division can move on.
    Chael is in full troll mode.

    Poor Melvin can’t get it together either, it’s always fun to watch. He was barking for a title shot way too early anyway.

  • G Funk

    Clint got hailed on in the post!