The Pseudo-Incredible Expanding UFC On Fox 6 Post

Mr. Fightlinker is out having a social life tonight, so us shut-in staff writers are gonna gangbang together a browser-crashin’ Expanding UFC On Fox 6 Post that’s at least somewhat Incredible, and in reverse order.  Like that movie “Memento”, remember?  Anyway, let’s get to it.

[tweet https://twitter.com/danawhite/status/295403737760018432]

Grant and Lamas were robbed.

A complete studio meltdown for last night’s show sent the entire UFC broadcast team scurrying for a side-studio in the bowels of the arena. About halfway through the third round between David Mitchell and Simeon Thoresen on the Facebook prelims, they tested out the new feed and treated fans to this shot (via Reddit) of Jon Anik and Dominick Cruz looking totally comfortable and not at all awkward around each other.

Dat stache.

JOHNSON vs DODSON
Fun fact: if you can catch a flyweight, he has to tell you where he hid his pot of gold.  But they’re awful quick, so good luck with that.  I don’t know what to say to anyone who thinks the wee-weights aren’t interesting, cause I watched this one twice in a row just to be sure of my own scoring (48-47 Mouse).  The Magician’s hands were great in the first 10 minutes, but Mighty Mouse had the superior gas to edge out the 3rd round, pull away in the 4th, and seal the deal with a beating in the 5th.  But Dodson isn’t going anywhere, and the flyweight division is still as young and thin as an early-2000′s Christina Aguilera, so don’t be surprised if he gets another shot fairly soon.

Clearly against the rules, and just as clearly milking those rules.

RAMPAGE vs TEIXEIRA
Rampage surprisingly weighed in at 204 lbs, which would seem to back up his claim of being in the best shape of his life.  But as it turned out, he brought his “banned” Reeboks and a couple leg-kicks to the cage, but not enough gas for the full three rounds.  Glover Tex got a measure of revenge for his mentor Chuck Liddell, but not the blowout/knockout that many were hoping for to give Rampage his comeuppance.

Here’s Rampage letting Glover try on the chain after the fight.

And for history’s sake, here’s Glover and Rampage from 10 years ago. (via The Underground)

PETTIS vs CERRONE
Showtime had Ben Askren in his corner, but not to worry, because unlike Guida, Askren recently finished a fight for once.  Speaking of title shots, can Pettis finally get one after making Cowboy shit his liver in under 3 minutes?  Somewhere, Bas Rutten just got wood.

(via Angry Black Man)

(via Jill Sandwich)

LAMAS vs KOCH
Hooray for back-to-back elbow finishes!  Aw, he leakin’… so much for the guy who almost got a shot at Aldo last summer.  Also like Grant, Lamas now has four straight wins since he dropped to 145 in mid-2011.  Perhaps a title shot coming for Lamas?

GRANT vs WIMAN
Wiman is a tough dude, but Canuck Gumby quickly picked him apart with clean muay thai and finshed with elbows n’ hammers in just under a round.  That makes four straight UFC wins at lightweight in less than 16 months for Grant… time for a step up in competition.

GUIDA vs HIOKI
I think we all expected this one to be a rather boring decision, and we weren’t wrong.  Guida is apparently quite happy to have mastered the art of not-fighting, and once again pulled off a split-D via holding his opponent down for part of each round without actually doing jack shit while on top.  Meanwhile, Hioki peppered him with shots on the feet and threatened with subs from the bottom, but I guess that shit doesn’t count.  It’s bad enough that Guida is gaming the system this hard, but a 30-27 from the one judge is like gift wrapping it for him.

(Gif via Angry Black Man)

I feel you, bro.

KRAUS vs STUMPF
Not much to say about this one, except that The Kraut kickboxed Stumpf up for three rounds, and probably ended his UFC career.

BONES vs SONNEN
Chael Sonnen is the consummate salesman, and christ, does he look big compared to Rogan.

ARIANNY vs BRITTNEY
Speaking of those who should maybe be retired, in my opinion, Brittney outshines the veteran Octo-Chick in every way.  (Pic via Brittney’s tweeter.)

BADER vs MATYUSHENKO
Darth gets back in the win column by giving the aging Janitor the same treatment Tito Ortiz gave him.  Ol’ Vladdy hadn’t fought in over a year, and has now suffered two 1st-round losses in a row.  I wouldn’t be surprised if he gets another chance though, presuming he wants it.

RUSSOW vs JORDAN
Local boy Russow blew his doughy wad in the 1st round, and got his big ass beat down in the 2nd by a dude who came up from the Strikeforce Challengers shows.  Being TKO’d by Werdum was understandable, but his job may be in danger after this one.

NATAL vs SPENCER
Rafael Natal has a great body and a beautiful girlfriend, according to Rafael Natal.  But we can all agree he has decent enough game to beat down and sub out Some Guy from the bushleagues.  Good for him.

(Pics by Esther Lin for MMAFighting, gifs via The UnderGround unless otherwise noted.)

  • Reverend Clint

    as soon as the knee to the head lands dodsons hand is already off the mat

  • drunkenjunk

    its time for arianny to be put out to pasture. bring back logan or natasha.
    guido can eat shit and die.

  • frickshun

    Grant’s face is completely motionless & devoid of effort while delivering those brutal elbows……

  • kvelertak

    Only surprise for me on this card was how quickly Pettis beat Cerrone.

  • Reverend Clint

    Cerrone hasnt gone down that fast since his last trip to the glory hole

  • Symbul

    Pretty sweet card.

  • DJ ThunderElbows

    ELBOWS!!!

    Koch’s lazy guard him, and Miman is Miman.

    Those Leever kicks were stupendous.

    Natal wins Ego of the Night.

  • kvelertak

    Also, Cruz is fucking terrible on camera. Get him out of there.

  • http://filmdrunk.com Filmdrunk

    I’ll take anyone over Anik. I hate that fucking fake-smoothe radio voice of his. Can’t we get Miletich over now that Strikeforce is done? I’d be down for Miletich-Rogan.

  • http://www.soundofthegame.com DarkJosh

    I would say that the fight of the night would be the main event. The mighty mouse successfully retained his title in his first title defense. Yup he got caught a couple times in the early rounds but Dodson can’t last Johnson along with his barrage of kicks and punch towards the end of the fight

  • frickshun

    Actually, I would say the force of the knee took his hand off. I’M STILL GLAD DJ WON.

  • CAP

    Clay Guida is officially the joe dirt of MMA. His hugfest strategy is even more lethal at featherweight. That stache is the only thing keeping him relevant right now in my book.

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