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These are not the fights you’re looking for

Strikeforce matchmaking has always been kinda wonky. Most recently they set up a one night tournament to establish a hot new contender for Sarah Kaufman at 135 pounds. Miesha Tate and her gravity defying ass came out on top, but instead of giving us that fight, Strikeforce is instead taking one of the few real 145 pounders they have in Marloes Coenen and giving her the title shot instead. That fight is going to be in October, on the same card as another interesting choice: Nick Diaz vs KJ Noons.

Now it’s hard to complain too much because Kaufman vs Coenen and Diaz vs Noons are both great fights. But they both get dragged down by the promotional dumb-assery that undercuts every Strikeforce card: these are not the fights that should be happening right now.

Nick Diaz should be fighting Jason ‘Mayhem’ Miller. You know, the star of that popular MTV show that Strikeforce uses about as effectively as dildo to scramble eggs? Dildos are for fucking vaginas, goddamnit. Why can’t Strikeforce put the dildo in the vagina?

You’ve seen all the evidence that says Diaz vs Miller is the fight that needs to happen right now: the Nashville brawl, the trading of insults, the *gasp* custom-made smack shirt! It’s like someone has been reading Tito Ortiz’s guide to sellable fights, circa 2001. Mayhem vs Diaz is one of the most interesting fights Strikeforce has in their pocket. I suppose that’s why they’re not booking it now. Gotta keep that stuff safe for LATER when it’ll be even BIGGER!

Or not. Look at what we’re getting now: KJ Noons vs Nick Diaz. We’ve got a pretty similar situation here … Noons and Diaz got into a post-fight brawl in 2008, and for a good twelve months everyone was hyped like a motherfucker for that fight. But between EliteXC douchebagginess and Noons refusing the fight, it never happened. Now two and a half years later, it’s kinda hard to get all heated up over Karl J puttin’ his mug on the Diaz brothers.

This isn’t to say excitement isn’t there. If you poke around enough, you’ll find it near Nog vs Couture, Liddell vs Silva, and other fights that missed their Best Before dates but still look pretty good when you dust them off. It’s just kinda frustrating when Strikeforce takes fights that need to happen and shelves them in favor of lesser hotness. Maybe we’ll get to see the fights we really wanna see, and maybe we won’t. Nick Diaz apparently wants to stick around at welterweight, and there’s another dead horse fight between him and Joe Riggs from 5 years ago that Strikeforce probably wants to book first.