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Tito Ortiz: Awesome Driver

Here’s a sad tale of woe for all you car affectionados out there: Tito Ortiz just crashed his Rolls Royce Phantom in a three car accident on Sunday. For those of you (like me) who don’t give much of a shit about this kind of thing, a Phantom goes for around $350,000 to $500,000, making it a big glistening penis for rich wankers to drive around in.

This isn’t Tito’s first fender bender. Back in April at a Toyota celebrity race event he smashed up his car twice. I’m sure all that whiplash is great for his spine and neck, especially with that giant bobblehead of a skull he’s got sitting on top of it all. Fortunately, like last time, Tito is fine (or maybe he isn’t and we’ll find out during his post-fight interview) and UFC 133 isn’t down another fight. For now.

  • DJ ThunderElbows

    I’m positive he cracked his 2nd and 4th skullilary bones – and even has a hairline fracture of his backyx – but won’t back out so he can earn enough by coasting to a loss for another Phantom.

  • kvelertak

    War Tito.

  • Reverend Clint

    i think his head must get in the way of driving. its sad he can afford a phantom since he sucks ass cock

  • CAP

    Tito can quit bitching about money driving a car like that. It will probably cost more to fix that than what my whole car is worth.

  • Reverend Clint

    maybe he give it to nick diaz

  • Komodo

    Well… he went out there and drove his heart out, guise.

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