War Machine tears up porn party

Good news and bad news in the world of War Machine. The good news: he hasn’t killed himself yet, despite a seemingly endless tirade of twitter messages implying he will. The bad news: it’s all the more likely now that he’s destroyed his budding porn career by going postal at an industry party. Some preliminary details from AdultFYI (and FYI, the site is NSFW):

“This looked like something out of a bad Vince McMahon script as this guy War Machine went nuts and began taking everyone on at this party,” The Vizier says. “We’re talking multiple assaults and battery with the cops after him.”

“War Machine’s own agent, Derek Hay, looked to be the primary target with a couple of shots to the head. Mika Tan’s Ex was KO’d as well & sent to hospital.”

“I never saw anything like it,” continued The Vizier. “War Machine was in kill mode. His fists were lethal weapons. Anyone who tried to get between him and Derek got taken down – hard.”

Considering he’s probably still on parole for similar acts of batshit violence, this might be the last straw for War and he might actually go to jail. It might be for the best. I can make a lot more jokes about prison than I can about suicide / death. Besides, War Machine has always said he wants to go somewhere where men can be men and dominate the weak. Well, prison should be right up his alley, although I’m pretty sure he’ll be surprised when he finds out what end of that particular stick he ends up on.

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