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What I hate about EliteXC

1. Who the fuck is that goofball with the pink hair putting hats on all the fighter’s heads?

2. What the fuck is up with Gary Shaw and his ridiculous tracksuits? He comes into the ring after every fight looking like a big fat goodfella, giving people pats on the back with his heavily ringed hands and kissing them on the cheek. Mama mia!

3. How the fuck is DJ Hapa still involved with the company after everything he cocked up at K1 Dynamite? Sure, they were a bit smarter this time and took away his mic, but by the end of the show I was seeing red every time he’d do some turntable scratching over the post-fight interview. Someone needs to smash this fucker’s fingers with a sledgehammer.

4. And what’s with the hoochie dance squad? Hey, I like women just as much as guys like Vin Diesel or Jake Gyllenhaal. But come on! I’m embarrassed to watch a show that features these talentless hacks flop around the stage like Britney at the VMAs. I have a feeling $kala talent scouted these chicks using youtube booty shake videos.

5. I’d just like to point out to anyone who said Goldberg was getting better: he’s not. He was absolutely terrible throughout the entire show. If he wasn’t mocking the winning fighters, he was pissing off the crowd. I have no idea how he ever made it as a popular pro wrestler … the guy’s got less charisma than a cockroach.

  • Jack

    I don’t know about you, but spending Saturday night watching this crap just made me fell dirty.

    The one of the best fights was the crocodile hunter’s bodyguard!?!

  • Audacity

    Goldberg never talked in WCW. He kicked down a door; got escorted to the ring by a SWAT team; got pelted by fireworks; Spear; Jackhammer; pin; win. He did the occassional yell. This may have left him unprepared for speaking roles.

  • Trol

    The so called DJ scratching was terrible. Someone should have yanked the plug on that guy. It was hilarious to watch those booty shake girls try to dance together. It looked like they rounded up some strippers shortly before the show. What was up with Goldberg putting his arm around all the fighters like that?

  • EdenMachine

    As long as that hot ass Gina Carano keeps fighting in them then I’ll be watching. Otherwise, I’m out!

  • fightlinker

    Fuck Gina … I wanna see more Mike Pyle being totally awesome

  • Mike David (Euthyphro)

    Pink hair is T.J. Thompson — the guy who used to own ICON Sport/Superbrawl, and sold it to EliteXC.

  • anderson

    goldberg sucks balls. the night of the diaz/aina fight he practically pushed nick diaz out of the ring and that shit with hitting jake shields hat like he was his little brother or something just pisses me off further. the guy’s an asshole.

  • marco9690

    Ross Pointon, Ellen DeGeneres, Dr. Phil…..anyone but Goldberg!

  • Jonathan

    Goldberg is so physically big that he makes the smaller fighters, and even some of the middleweights look puny and un-intimidating when next to him. The Hoochie Dance Squad did look out of whack, but they had nice tits.

  • dignan

    The hoochie dance squad were brutal…any beauty they had was lost when they started popping and locking out of sync, out of time. Fuck that was bad. I hope they know it too.

    They weren’t even dancing, they were stripping without the pole, and a with a few clothes on. I was surprised they didn’t do some type of spread eagle move.

    Ahh Goldberg…all I thought was, holy shit he’s bigger than Kimbo.

  • c-ing_red

    Goldberg should fight Kimbo or put him on Human Weapon and have him battle Bill Duff. Or have Mirko use him as a punching bag. Wait, Mark Hunt!!!!!

  • Kel

    Who the hell was the metro-minion runnig around after all of the fighters? Also, what’s up with all of the hat swapping?

  • Kel

    Who the hell was the metro-minion running around after all of the fighters?
    The dancers did seem like they were competing against each other…It was almost like they had their own impromptu “Ultimate Ring Girl” going on…

  • Mobb Deep

    This just made me realize, why is Goldberg an MMA announcer? Seriously, does he know/train MMA or some shit. Fuck, at least Rogan knows what hes talking about.

  • Ted Dibiase

    seriously, im surprised Bill Duff doesnt try to do the spear of jackhammer on the Human Weapon.

    Goldberg dont have the mic skills I gots. Plus Virgil can pop lock like no other. Sign us up!!!!!

  • Xavier

    Gary Shaw is the dumb.

  • c-ing_red

    Maybe we can get Goldberg in the ring with Brock Lesnar. Maybe they will power bomb each other….oh wait, didn’t that fight happen once or twice in Pride?

  • Hayes

    That insufferable loser son, Jared Shaw, aka $kala. His prescence makes my stomach turn. He stuck his head on camera during the Renegade PPV on more than one occasion (most notably chasing down Nick Diaz after he ran out of the ring). Don’t know what is his official job, but it’s obvious he is a mental midget who is simply there because his dad is boss and the look on everybody else’s face when encountering him on camera is “fuck, this annoying pest is in my grill again?” He’s nothing more than a wannabe and should go back to being in an eminem cover band.